IJBFC Chat - December 6, 2009

(Name of message originator in [] brackets at the beginning of each line)

[Mike Amo] Hi LL

[Maxwell] Oh, yeah...that's right.

[Laura Leff] Hi folks...

[Brad from Georgia] Hi, Laura!

[Maxwell] Hey boss!

[ed] hi ll

[Laura Leff] Thanks in advance for your flexibility in the time today!

[Mike Amo] You made it easier for some of us  

[Maxwell] Worked out better for me at this time as things turned out.

[Laura Leff] Had a commitment up in Napa and wasn't sure I'd make it back in time.

[Brad from Georgia] That's OK. Might sign out early, though--I have a final exam to give first thing tomorrow.

[Laura Leff] OK, well, good! Glad that it was a good thing!

[Brad from Georgia] Up in wine country, eh?

[Maxwell] *hic*

[Laura Leff] Yes...I'm not used to having that much wine period, let alone that early in the day. I felt like Phil Harris.

User steve -shimp- has entered this room.

[Maxwell] Phil wouldn't drink anything as mild as wine!

[Laura Leff] But I'm netter bow.

[Brad from Georgia] Hi steve!

[Laura Leff] Hi Steve!

[steve -shimp-] Hi all!

[Maxwell] Hey steve!

[steve -shimp-] Good crowd of regulars here..

[ed] hi steve

[Brad from Georgia] "I'm not so thunk as pome seeple drink I am."

[Laura Leff] Maxwell - Yes...was thinking that as I typed it...

[steve -shimp-] tipsy regulars?

[Mike Amo] Hi Shimp

[steve -shimp-] Hi Mike

[Laura Leff] I went to a birthday party for friend in Napa and wasn't sure I would make it back in time. Thus the time slip. But it sounds like it worked out well for folks.

[Maxwell] I'll drink to that!

[Laura Leff] So anyhow...I'm just finishing up the show for tonight...

[Laura Leff] What did folks think?

[steve -shimp-] I'm just starting it  

[steve -shimp-] didn't do my homework ...

[Brad from Georgia] I liked it--that was an interesting game they talked about.

[Laura Leff] I'm sure George Balzer wrote the Notre Dame bit...he was a huge ND fan.

[Maxwell] Any show with Mel as Professor LaBlanc is great!

[Brad from Georgia] The '48 game wound up as a tie, you know--14-all.

[Brad from Georgia] So Dennis's rooting for both sides somehow...made sense.

[Maxwell] That's why he sat on the 50 yard line.

[Brad from Georgia] And got chalk all over him.

[Laura Leff] And got chalk on his pants

[Brad from Georgia] Great minds, LL!

[Laura Leff] Yeah!

[Mike Amo] Good show...hadn't heard it before, great mix of everything

[Brad from Georgia] Some nice Dennis's mom jokes, too!

[Laura Leff] So...here's a challenge...is there any drawback to the fact that this show is more of a string of bits?

[steve -shimp-] I personally tend to like those shows...

[Maxwell] Not with the bits strung together as well as they were.

[Brad from Georgia] I look on shows like this as little strings of pearls.

[Laura Leff] Not necessarily a storyline, like Jack renewing his driver's license, etc.

[steve -shimp-] Are there ANY that are really strong on plot?

[Brad from Georgia] They're a nice change-up from the sitcom-style shows that were coming to dominate in that period.

[Mike Amo] And he eventually got to the vault

[Laura Leff] Steve - Well, the movie skits may have more plot because of the source material

[Brad from Georgia] Yes! Ed's always a stitch!

[steve -shimp-] true

[Laura Leff] Or having the Colmans over for dinner

[Laura Leff] I guess even the train station episodes are really a string of bits. Frank Nelson - Anaheim - Si/Sy

[steve -shimp-] Yes, I suppose there are some that "build" more, like the Christmas show frustration with Mel

[Brad from Georgia] Just watched "Anatomy of a Murder" on TV earlier tonight...Joe Kearns as the photographer..."ALL my pictures 'come out!'"

[steve -shimp-] Great movie

[Laura Leff] Oh, that's a great movie!

[steve -shimp-] Haven't seen it in awhile.

[Laura Leff] Some are pink...

[Laura Leff] Ahem

[Maxwell] Any movie with Jimmy Stewart, Joe Kearns, Eve Arden, AND Duke Ellington has to be good.

[Laura Leff] Amen to that

[steve -shimp-] Agreed!

[Laura Leff] And...I'm trying to remember who played the gorgeous woman. Ann Margret? Lee Meriwether?

User yhtapmys has entered this room.

[Maxwell] Lee Remick

[Mike Amo] Hi yht

[Laura Leff] Lee Remick! Of course.

[steve -shimp-] Hiya yht

[yhtapmys] Hi Mike

[Maxwell] Hey yht

[Laura Leff] Hi Yht!

[yhtapmys] Geez, this new screen makes the chat window look small.

[Laura Leff] Yeah, wish it was sizeable.

[Mike Amo] Mine makes it look big

[steve -shimp-] click the magnifying glass with the plus

[Brad from Georgia] And the reliable Arthur O'Connell as the drunken ex-lawyer.

[Brad from Georgia] Hy, yht.

[Laura Leff] That increases the font, but not the window

[yhtapmys] I got a wide screen and had to muck with the DPI and resolution to make it work at all.

[yhtapmys] Hi, Brad.

[Mike Amo] Usually I'm reading the transcripts, which are smaller

[Brad from Georgia] I let my window float and that enlarges everything.

[steve -shimp-] I can change the window to any size with the float

[yhtapmys] Arthur O'Connoll was great.

[yhtapmys] He was in that show with Monte Markham.

[Laura Leff] Brad - Which reminds me of a Rusty Warren joke I can't tell publicly...

[Laura Leff] Lee Meriwether performed in at least a couple Benny TV shows around the time of that movie, I think.

[steve -shimp-] Yep.

[Brad from Georgia] George C. Scott as the prosecutor who takes over the case...you know Jimmy Stewart was a great actor becase he never let Scott steal the scene.

[Laura Leff] And that says a LOT

[Laura Leff] It's like saying he never let Marlon Brando steal the scene

[Brad from Georgia] Oh, yes, Howard Macnear was in it, too--the doctor who testified. He looked a lot like a barber for some reason.

[Laura Leff] Or Jack Nicholson

[Maxwell] Now that would be an interesting pairing.

[steve -shimp-] I wish Eve Arden was better remembered today. I get a lot more mileage out of OUR MISS BROOKS, than I LOVE LUCY these days.

[Brad from Georgia] And Murray Hamilton as the barkeep. He changed so little between that film and "Jaws!"

[steve -shimp-] Man, this really IS a great cast.

[Maxwell] There was a nice article about her in "Nostalgia Digest" a couple of issues ago.

[Laura Leff] One of these days I'll see "Jaws"

[Brad from Georgia] Eve Arden was great. One of those wise-cracking beauties we talked about last chat. You know, I love smart women.

[Laura Leff] Brad - Yes, that's a very good point. Wise-cracking and single. A rarity in that time.

[steve -shimp-] She could be very subtle-funny like Jack too.

[Brad from Georgia] You can waste your whole life talking to dull men, or you can go to lunch with four smart women and you feel like you're going to live forever.

[steve -shimp-] A great "reactor"

[Laura Leff] Brad - If they let you.  

[yhtapmys] Brad, you mean like Mary?

[Mike Amo] She did fine in the Grease movies too

[Brad from Georgia] Yht--we talked about Mary sort of fitting into that category, but not quite. She's kind of a mixture.

[Laura Leff] She evolved over time

[yhtapmys] Oh, I know.

[Laura Leff] Dumb Dora to man-chaser to...Mary

[yhtapmys] I'm not crazy about the dumb Mary.

[Laura Leff] So what else about tonight's show?

[Maxwell] "Do you like Kipling?"

[Maxwell] "I don't know. I never kippled."

[Laura Leff] Or technically, fan-girl Mary in the very beginning

[steve -shimp-] Oh, hey, I learned a weird bit of Benny trivia, anyone want to try their expertise?

[Brad from Georgia] I did like the Jack/Don "Apology" thread in the plot.

[Laura Leff] Maxwell - I recently watched the first season of "The Muppet Show" and heard that joke and variations on it about a thousand times.

[Laura Leff] Steve - Go for it.

[steve -shimp-] John Travolta is related by marriage to what Jack Benny Show cast member?

[steve -shimp-] Or rather, John travolta is what cast member's son's wife's brother?

[Laura Leff] I don't even know who his wife is. Olivia Newton-John?

[Brad from Georgia] Umm...Don Wilson?

[steve -shimp-] I don't know what that is, nephew-in-law? son-in-law once removed?

[Brad from Georgia] No, couldn't be.

[Laura Leff] I don't think Don had kids

[yhtapmys] S.C. Inetologist?

[Brad from Georgia] Well....you know.

[steve -shimp-] Not Don

[Laura Leff] Dennis?

[Maxwell] Olivia Newton-John is the granddaughter of physist Max Born.

[Laura Leff] So many kids

[steve -shimp-] Not Dennis

[Laura Leff] Eddie Anderson?  

[Maxwell] Mel Blanc?

[steve -shimp-] Not Eddie

[steve -shimp-] Not Mel

[Brad from Georgia] Phil Harris.

[Mike Amo] Slim Pickens?  

[steve -shimp-] Process of elimination...

[steve -shimp-] Not Phil or Slim

[Maxwell] Joe Kearns?

[Brad from Georgia] F. Lee Boone.

[steve -shimp-] Not Joe

[yhtapmys] I don't think Kearns had kids.

[Brad from Georgia] Speedy Riggs.

[Laura Leff] Frank Nelson

[steve -shimp-] Or F.E. Boone (or Speedy)

[steve -shimp-] Nor Nelson

[Mike Amo] Remley

[steve -shimp-] Or Remley

[steve -shimp-] Give up?

[Laura Leff] Someone musical?

[steve -shimp-] Nope

[Laura Leff] No...let's not give up

[Brad from Georgia] Bea Benederet

[Laura Leff] We should be able to get this

[Brad from Georgia] Spelled it wrong.

[steve -shimp-] ding ding ding, it's bea

[Brad from Georgia] Well, of course it is.

[Maxwell] I knew it all along!

[Laura Leff] Woo hoo! And Gene Twombley too?

[steve -shimp-] John's sister Ellen Travolta is married to Bea's son Jack Bannon (who used to be on Lou Grant)

[steve -shimp-] Not Twombley, her first husband

[steve -shimp-] Jim Bannon

[Brad from Georgia] Twombley still sounds like a made-up name to me....

[Laura Leff] Or was it her first

[Laura Leff] Got it.

[Maxwell] Brad, I went to school with a kid named Trombley, so it does to me, too.

[Brad from Georgia] Here's a little bit of trivia: what poet narrates, in his own voice, a Levi's jeans commercial?

[yhtapmys] Leonard Cohen?

[Maxwell] Rudyard Kipling!

[Brad from Georgia] Nope.

[Brad from Georgia] Nope, not Kip.

[Maxwell] I should watch more commercials.

[Brad from Georgia] It's Walt Whitman. One of the very earliest Edison recordings in existence.

[Laura Leff] e.e. cummings

[Brad from Georgia] Nah, cummings was shiftless.

[Maxwell] Robert Cummings!

[steve -shimp-] cool. What year is the recording?

[Laura Leff] Robert Browning!

[Brad from Georgia] I'd have to check. 1885-ish, though.

[steve -shimp-] wow!

[steve -shimp-] I'm sure it's on youtube

[Laura Leff] Oh...I'm slow from the wine...just got the cummings joke.

[Maxwell] Which would make it one of the earliest videos.

[Laura Leff] So was Fred Allen.

[steve -shimp-] Edison Youtube Cylinder

[Laura Leff] Shakespeare

[Maxwell] Longfellow.

[Laura Leff] William Burroughs

[Laura Leff] Socrates

[steve -shimp-] I hate cranking the computer, and that big horn!

[Laura Leff] Steve - You need a USB crank.

[Maxwell] Socrates Miller, played by Jackie Cooper, with Mary Jane Croft as Cleo the talking basset hound.

[yhtapmys] What about Socrates Mulligan?

[Laura Leff] Spike Jones

[yhtapmys] He was shortshifted, once removed.

[Laura Leff] Better than being shortsheeted

[Laura Leff] What...we didn't get it yet?

[Brad from Georgia] The recording is here: www.slate.com/id/2233597/

[Laura Leff] Silence while we all look it up...

User Mike Amo has logged out.

[Laura Leff] Whoa...

[Laura Leff] I thought you were joking about Walt Whitman

User Mike Amo has entered this room.

[Mike Amo] lol, checking it bumped me out of the chat room

[ed] hi mike again

[Mike Amo] ty'

[Maxwell] At least they don't have to pay him.

[Brad from Georgia] No...I think Jack tried to get him to read on one of his early shows, but you know....

[Laura Leff] You can hear the aging on the cylinder...I can envision it going around

[Laura Leff] Walt Whitman on an acoustical recording, singing the body electric

[Mike Amo] wow

[Maxwell] By Ray Bradbury.

[Brad from Georgia] I have this picture of a panel truck driving up to Harleigh Cemetery in Camden, Conn., and the guy leaves a big box of Levi's on Whitman's grave.

[Laura Leff] That's pretty cool

[Laura Leff] I think Whitman would probably have rather run around naked.

[yhtapmys] With whom?

[steve -shimp-] I wonder how Whitman would've liked hawking jeans?

[Laura Leff] Someone male, per what I've been told...

[Laura Leff] I don't think Whitman would have been into being a pitchman for anything

[steve -shimp-] Yeah, that's my gut feeling.

[Brad from Georgia] My great-aunt Mary had one of those old Edison machines. One of my uncles inherited it. I remember she had a wax cylinder of William Jennings Bryan, and I remember looking him up in the encyclopedia to see who he was.

[Laura Leff] Oh, I've got Silvertone records with Bryan on them.

[Maxwell] Bryan had a great speaking voice.

[Laura Leff] What was it...the golden-throated orator on Silvertone?

[Maxwell] Just imagine being able to buy a recording of Bryan from the Sears catalog.

[Brad from Georgia] "Now, this cross of gold thing. CUT IT OUT!"

[Laura Leff] It would probably get broken in shipping

[Maxwell] Silvertone is the right brand. No crucifying anyone on a cross of gold.

[Laura Leff] Well, we're far afield here, but I'm OK with it if you are...

[Brad from Georgia] There is a recording which MAY be Mark Twain...or it MAY be a very early Hal Holbrook-type impersonator. There is a short Edison film of Twain puttering about.

[Laura Leff] Where would you like to go today?

[Maxwell] I remember some of my great grandmothers old records...about three inches thick.

[Laura Leff] Brad - Oh, I've seen that. And having tea with his wife or daughter...or both.

[Maxwell] I'd like to see Philadelphia before I die.

[Laura Leff] Maxwell - Sound like Edison Diamond Discs.

[Laura Leff] On the whole, I'd rather be in Philadelphia.

[Laura Leff] Brad - Not meaning that his wife and daughter were the same person...I just can't remember how many ladies were at the table.

[Mike Amo] I have about a dozen of those oversized Armed Forces Radio records from WW II

[Brad from Georgia] Well, in this episode I really liked Dennis. Silly, but not full-tilt boogie silly. I like his occasional self-referential gags: "Dennis, did you suddenly go nuts?" "No. I've always been nuts."

[Mike Amo] command performance and others

[Laura Leff] Yes, although my suspension of disbelief is a little strained with him innocently watching people flip a coin on who needs to talk with him...

[Brad from Georgia] Laura--It was probably his two surviving daughters. His wife died before the advent of movies, if I recall correctly.

[yhtapmys] There's some great stuff here. I liked Mel's read in the Wilshire joke punchline.

[Maxwell] Speaking of Command Performance, Sirius/XM played one this week with Rudy Vallee, Frank Sinatra, Mary, and Fred Allen.

[yhtapmys] One word and he milks it.

[Laura Leff] Brad - OK, that may be it. It's been many years since I saw it.

[Maxwell] Oh, wait...that was Mail Call.

[yhtapmys] And Don's bad impression of Barrymore is funny.

[Brad from Georgia] Great opening gag, too, with Mel not quite run down by the bus outside Jack's house.

[Laura Leff] I like the "eight thousand dollars" line.

[Maxwell] I liked the 15-cent fine.

[yhtapmys] And the turkey hash running joke.

[Brad from Georgia] Jack also paid off nicely by remembering in the vault to deduct fifteen cents because Professor LeBlanc insulted him.

[yhtapmys] "Thanksgiving is gone, but the memory lingers on."

[Brad from Georgia] Ain't it the truth.

[Brad from Georgia] That's why our family ate out this past Thanksgiving.

[Laura Leff] Dan catered two other dinners, so he just made a little more of their stuff for us. Who ever gets just a cup of mashed potatoes? We did!

[Laura Leff] Anyhow...

[yhtapmys] Sounds like something Jack would serve.

[Mike Amo]  

[Laura Leff] Don't give up the ship

[yhtapmys] "And you want the skin, too?!"

[Brad from Georgia] By pure chance I've been listening to a run of '48 shows while walking on the nature trail this past week, and the last one I listened to was the Thanksgiving show...and then realized that this week's show was the next one in line.

[Brad from Georgia] I'll hear it again tomorrow when I do my exercise.

[Laura Leff] Go figure! Timing is everything.

[yhtapmys] Hurray for Tallulah Turkey!

[Laura Leff] Can you do that with all the snow?

[yhtapmys] No snow here.

[Brad from Georgia] We ain't got a LICK of snow.

[yhtapmys] How big is a lick?

[steve -shimp-] My nature trail has alligators on it.

[Mike Amo] 5 inches 25 miles west of DC, no accumulation here

[Brad from Georgia] Not even very cold. It did get down to 26 last night, but it will be in the high fifties tomorrow. A lick is less than a dab and a little more than juest a tad.

[Laura Leff] You get your neighbor's Oscar taken away from you on Jack's trail.

[yhtapmys] The things you learn.

[steve -shimp-] just this side of a smidge

[Maxwell] I thought the size of a lick depended on the size of the dog.

[Laura Leff] Oh yes, and Phil's line about the St. Bernard was good as well.

[yhtapmys] Laura, here's a question...

[Laura Leff] Yht - OK.

[yhtapmys] Is there any way of knowing who wrote which half of the show?

[Brad from Georgia] Steve--I bought my wife a set of "Southern measuring spoons" as a gag gift last Christmas. They're graduated in units like "tad," "smidgen," "pinch," and "little bitty pinch".

[steve -shimp-] Oh, funny!

[Laura Leff] Yht - Sometimes. You generally need to figure it from the names or references in the text itself.

[Brad from Georgia] "Lousy half a pint." Hah!

[Laura Leff] Yht - Like George and Sam wrote whichever half had the Notre Dame bit.

[yhtapmys] The Phil-alphabet joke was good, too.

[Brad from Georgia] You know, the writers had to be good to meld the show in mid-point without the seam showing. That's hard to do.

[Brad from Georgia] yht--Yes, I'd forgotten that! Great Phil gag.

[yhtapmys] Did they go to Notre Dame?

[Laura Leff] It's true, but they also had a rough sketch of what they wanted to do with the show before they split it.

[yhtapmys] Or were they football fans?

[Laura Leff] Yht - George Balzer was a huge ND fan. He even left some of his papers there.

[yhtapmys] OK.

[Maxwell] And he never got back to South Bend to pick them up.

[Brad from Georgia] My late writing partner Tom Fuller and I once split a script that way, with me doing the first half and him doing the second. "The Great Air Monopoly."

[Laura Leff] Also, George and Sam were more "visual" writers. So if you've got a gag sort of like "a moose needs a hatrack", that's going to more likely be George/Sam.

[Brad from Georgia] "Shot the mouse in Minnesota, trapped the moose under the Frigidaire."

[Laura Leff] There's even a show where there's a gag about a guy with three heads (or something similar), and Jack does an aside like "Gee, we wrote that and George isn't even here."

[Brad from Georgia] Yes, I just heard that episode.

[yhtapmys] Thanks, Laura. I didn't know. That's great.

[Laura Leff] Brad - Oh good! Can you give a little more context on it?

[Laura Leff] It's been a while since I heard the gag.

[Brad from Georgia] "Gee, Bill Fields had a clever idea. Covered the bottom of his swimming pool with green marbles. Oh, wait, those aren't marbles. They're olives."

[Laura Leff] Now all this Thanksgiving talk is giving me a craving for turkey and gravy and cranberries.

[Brad from Georgia] LL-Hah! I listen to two or three episodes a day--more than a dozen a week--so all I know is that it was a fall '48 show.

[Maxwell] I like sloshing the turkey through the cranberries....

[Laura Leff] Oh well. I'm pretty sure I did a reference on it 39 Forever if anyone's ever looking for it.

[Laura Leff] Maxwell - Like tiptoeing through the tulips

[Laura Leff] Any other Benny-related questions floating around out there before we go for the stratosphere?

[Brad from Georgia] I think (but don't quote me) that Jack made a crack about either Phil or Remley's replacement having one or more extra heads; it got a laugh, and Jack murmurs, "Gee, we wrote that and George isn't even here." Did they go to NY that fall? That may have

[Brad from Georgia] been it.

[Mike Amo] I liked how Jack threw in a plug for Don Ameche's new Lucky Strike show while he was on his way to the vault

[Laura Leff] Brad - Yes, I think it was a New York show.

[Laura Leff] I'm surprised they didn't work it into Phil's bit since he calls him on the Don Ameche.

[Laura Leff] Maybe that's more of a Bill Fields line.

[Laura Leff] Yht - This may be more than you want to know, but another clue is sometimes when names are used and they're the wife of a writer, or their kids, etc.

[Brad from Georgia] It was probably a late spring show, then...Jack spent the summer of '48 touring Europe.

[yhtapmys] Ok.

[Laura Leff] Brad - That sounds more right to me.

[Brad from Georgia] Jack had Fred Allen on his show as guest, and then Jack was a guest on Allen's show...we heard that one for the chat not all that long ago.

[Laura Leff] OH right...was that Fred's last show?

[Laura Leff] Or did I pick another...I thought about using the last show.

[Laura Leff] Hi Ed...are we boring you?

[Laura Leff] Guess so...  

[yhtapmys] Interesting how the Dewey joke got the most applause. The show was a month after the election.

[Mike Amo] LL, if it wasn't, post Fred's last show

[ed] not at all LL been watching it happened one night plus listening to the radio version on the dvd

[Laura Leff] Ed - Ah OK. Just wanted to make sure since I didn't think I'd seen much from you!

[yhtapmys] I was really disappointed by Fred's last show. Other than the "Not that cheap on my own show" joke.

[ed] sorry LL

[Laura Leff] Ed - Oh no apology needed. Just wanted to make sure you weren't left out!

[Brad from Georgia] Hey, I heard that Truman lost five bucks betting on that election.

[steve -shimp-] Yeah, Fred seems really annoyed to even be there on that show IIRC

[ed] thank you for your concern

[Laura Leff] So what else is on everyone's mind tonight? I guess we'll officially throw it open!

[steve -shimp-] Plastic tips or metal tips this holiday season?

[Brad from Georgia] Well, my wife and I are winging up to NYC week after next to consult, consort, confabulate, and otherwise hobnob with my agent and editors.

[Maxwell] I'm shopping for gopher traps.

[Laura Leff] Gopher trap

[Mike Amo] Exhaustion here...Redskins game and Xmas party wore me out  

[Laura Leff] Maxwell - Jinx!

[Brad from Georgia] Anybody know what a goopher is?

[steve -shimp-] The gopher after you take it out of the trap?

[Brad from Georgia] I think that's an odd Southern term nobody else knows.

[Maxwell] I heard a great Redskins joke last night but can't tell it here.

[yhtapmys] A little mammal that likes peanuts?

[Mike Amo] lol, I heard that one Friday, same routine, trap was new to me

[Laura Leff] A rodent that lives in a Pyle?

[ed] yes my 'skins loose to the saints in OT

[Brad from Georgia] No, a goopher is a curse placed on land or on animals as opposed to on people.

[steve -shimp-] oh, like "goofer dust"

[Mike Amo] I was there, Ed

[ed] ouch!!!

[Brad from Georgia] Steve-Exactl.

[steve -shimp-] I knew that one.

[Brad from Georgia] (That was supposed to be mock Yiddish)

[Laura Leff] Brad - Interesting. I can say pretty confidently that I never heard that used in the Midwest.

[yhtapmys] It didn't make it to Canada.

[Laura Leff] But we don't go around putting curses on land or animals much, either.

[Brad from Georgia] I think it is probably African in origin.

[Laura Leff] Was wondering if it had any roots in Voodoo.

[Brad from Georgia] It can still be heard in New Orleans, so yeah, I suppose it has a Voodoo connection. I've heard it 'round here, though.

[Laura Leff] Is that why the Cubs can't get to the World Series?

[Laura Leff] Because of the goat?

[Laura Leff] Maybe it was a goofer goat.

[Maxwell] No, the Cubs can't make it to the Series because they stink.

[Maxwell] (White Sox fan here.)

[Brad from Georgia] Yeah, that would be a goopher curse. The Cubs' field would have been goophered by a houngan.

[Laura Leff] Maxwell - Spoken like someone who lives in Chicago.

[Brad from Georgia] LL--something you wrote at the outset reminded me of a Kitzel line: "The wine flowed like celery tonic.

[Laura Leff] Any big plans for the holidays? Mine start on Friday.

[yhtapmys] Working.

[Laura Leff] Brad - That's cel-ray tonic.

[Mike Amo] Orlando for New Years

[yhtapmys] I'm not on the air, I'm doing the desk for the first time in two years.

[Brad from Georgia] Just family get-together, but that's very dear to my heart.

[ed] the bulls the bears the cubs who cares that comes from a cards fan

[Maxwell] We're staying home for the holidays. I guess our son is having us all over for Christmas.

[Mike Amo] Went to Pakm Springs a month ago, first time...no maxwell

[Mike Amo] well, one here  

[Brad from Georgia] Alabama won the big SEC game over Florida yesterday.

[Mike Amo] oops, Palm

[yhtapmys] Mike, did you see Charlie Farrell Star of Seventh Heaven?

[Laura Leff] P-A-L-M...S-P-R-I-N-G-S. Pakm Springs

[Brad from Georgia] Stupid Crimson Tide, stealing all the potential book buyers from Birmingham.

[Mike Amo] Or was it Dreer Poosen?

[yhtapmys] Just one rehearsal!

[Laura Leff] Mike - Did you murder anyone?

[Laura Leff] At the racquet club?

[Laura Leff] Or did you club anyone at the racquet murder

[Mike Amo] Nope :D Ooh, I have a question! That gopher trap show

[yhtapmys] I understand he met Mitzi LaRue.

[Laura Leff] Mike - OK...I may have to look up the answer...

[Brad from Georgia] You know, on Thursday last week--speaking of snow--I walked on the track at school wearing jogging pants and short sleeves. Other people were in jackets. I sneer at their feeble constitutions.

[ed] mike romanoff

[Mike Amo] Longest laugh I'd heard on a JB show was in reaction to Mel Blanc's clerk saying not you again or something like that

[ed] or frankie

[Laura Leff] Mike - It must have been long but not THAT long...I probably would have picked up on it. You wondering about the length of laugh?

[Brad from Georgia] I heard the "Oh shut up!" show with Dorothy Kirsten a week or two ago. That was a good healthy laugh.

[Laura Leff] I don't think it's on my list of long laughs...

[Brad from Georgia] We had an earthquake today!

[Mike Amo] yes LL ... seemed a lot longer than I'd heard before, even for Your money or your life

[Laura Leff] Let's see...12/14/52

[Brad from Georgia] I know that's nothing big in CA, but for Georgia it's unusual.

[Mike Amo] how big, Brad?\

[Maxwell] Are you sure is was an earthquake, or was Jack opening his vault?

[Laura Leff] Let me do a little on-the-minute research...

[yhtapmys] Snort! Maxwell.

[Brad from Georgia] Haven't heard, but they're typically 5.0 or less in Georgia. We had a 5.4 one once that shook our house.

[Laura Leff] Mike - Do you know about where it is in the show?

[Laura Leff] Is it early, as in Mel Blanc saying "not you again" from the previous year

[Laura Leff] or later as Jack goes back over and over again?

[Brad from Georgia] There is an earthquake fault that runs right through Buford Dam, which impounds Lake Lanier, the largest man-made lake in the state.

[Mike Amo] yes LL

[Mike Amo] early, first encounter

[Laura Leff] Not with the psychologist though...

[Laura Leff] ?

[Mike Amo] with the store clerk, Mel, to buy a gopher trap

[Maxwell] I'd guess 10 minutes or so into the show.

[Maxwell] I heard it twice this week.

[Brad from Georgia] Is that the show that ends with Mel's going insane, and the network cuts off the closing laugh?

[Maxwell] Mel talks to the shrink...then Jack encounters Frank Nelson, the horse with the Danish doctor. Then Jack goes for the gopher trap.

[Maxwell] I love the anticipatory laugh when Jack decides to buy Don a gopher trap.

[Laura Leff] OK...I'm almost there.

[Maxwell] That's where Jack lost something moving to TV. The horse gallop when he calls Nelson the second time.

[Laura Leff] 19 seconds...pretty good!

[yhtapmys] And it's running on speed?

[Mike Amo]  

[Laura Leff] It sounds like it is

[Brad from Georgia] News just said our earthquake was 3.2, near Deepstep, GA. Yes, that is a real community. It's southeast of Atlanta, over toward Augusta.

[yhtapmys] Ok. Some shows sound fast.

[Laura Leff] I'm not detecting any speed (high or low) issues on it.

[Laura Leff] Congrats Mike! I'll credit you with finding that.

[yhtapmys] Brad, is that near Doo Wah Diddy?

[Mike Amo] ty LL

[Laura Leff] I bet it's an even Deeper Step now.

[yhtapmys] Groan.

[Brad from Georgia] Well, it ain't no town and it ain't no city. It's kinda small, but not very pretty, so . . . guess not.

[Laura Leff] A 3.2 earthquake out here would be met with the answer, "What earthquake?"

[Laura Leff] Unless you were on top of the epicenter.

[steve -shimp-] basement full of those berry jams is just full of broken glass and goo now.

[Maxwell] I don't want to be around when the New Madrid fault gives the next time.

[Brad from Georgia] I was in California once and thought there was a big earthquake going on. Turned out to be the Napa wine.

[Laura Leff] The wine or the wine train?

[Maxwell] You should have taken a Napa after drinking it.

[Brad from Georgia] Actually, I never drink . . . wine.

[Maxwell] Thank you, Bela.

[Laura Leff] We sell no wine before its time.

[Maxwell] What time is it?

[Laura Leff] It's Howdy Doody Time

[steve -shimp-] I mixed some ripple, and some cream, and called it "cripple"

[ed] shine on harvest moon shine

[Laura Leff] I heard Leon Redbone singing "Shine on Harvest Moon" a few weeks ago.

[Brad from Georgia] The earthquake was seven miles from Millidgeville, three miles from Deepstep, 95 miles from Atlanta. Windows rattled as far away as Cumming.

[ed] hey it rhymes

[Brad from Georgia] LL--On "Prairie Home Companion?"

[Laura Leff] Brad - Don't know...I got in my car and it was on, then I turned it off when he was done.

[Laura Leff] Or turned to another station.

[Brad from Georgia] (Yes, Virginia, there is a Cumming, GA). It was the Keillor show, LL.

[Laura Leff] Brad - That must be why I turned it off.  

[Mike Amo]  

[Laura Leff] Apologies to Keillor fans.

[Maxwell] I used to like Garrison Keillor. Then something happened.

[Maxwell] Not sure what...but something happened.

[Laura Leff] You woke up?

[ed] one night

[Brad from Georgia] That's ok. We got to see him in person right after his stroke. But I think I wrote about that. Max--maybe his sojourn in New York. That definitely changed his humor.

[Laura Leff] Sorry...went for the easy gag.

[Maxwell] Must be. Even went to see his show in Chicago.

[ed] soory its the movie im watching

[Maxwell] Brad, yeah...that's what it was.

[Maxwell] Come to think of it.

[Brad from Georgia] I never warmed to his non-PHC show from New York. It got nasty in tone.

[Laura Leff] I think he had a marriage to a woman from...Sweden?...about that time as well.

[Maxwell] He changed the name of the show, got married, and became unfunny.

[Laura Leff] Not sure when it was or if it affected his work.

[Mike Amo] I still enjoyed meeting Hans Conreid in 1963...can pick him out on any radio show

[Brad from Georgia] LL-Yes. He's been married and divorced three or four times.

[Laura Leff] Inevitably.

[Laura Leff] Brad - There's got to be a joke in there somewhere. Probably several of them.

[Brad from Georgia] I didn't meet Hans, but saw him perform as Mr. Doolittle in "My Fair Lady" in Atlanta years ago.

[Mike Amo] saw Garrison a couple times at Wolf Trap here...at least it's a radio show  

[Laura Leff] Along the line of "Wouldn't eat the mushrooms, eh?" He's a Natural-Born Keillor.

[Brad from Georgia] I like Keillor's shows generally. When he's in our area, we make an effort to go. And of course I have written for him off and on.

[ed] he'll show up here in springfield in feb show was postponed when he fell ill

[steve -shimp-] I don't especially enjoy Keillor but I listen to him a lot just because I kind of keep the dial parked on NPR.

[Laura Leff] Brad - I'm sure you don't take my general disinterest in his work personally. Maybe if I'd heard your bits for him, I'd be more interested!

[Maxwell] Then there was Butch Thompson leaving the show...he was half the reason I listened.

[ed] NPR give to your local channel

[Brad from Georgia] Nah, no offense taken, LL! My bits tended to be the "Bertha's Kitty Boutique" commercials and occasionally all or part of a Guy Noir sketch.

[Maxwell] I won't give anything to the Chicago NPR station because they dropped their jazz programming a couple of years ago.

[Brad from Georgia] Once they did a whole five-minute bit I had written for a pledge show, having to do with sound-effects. Keillor changed the name of the "evil" sound-effects guy to "Brad" from the name I'd used!

[Laura Leff] And I've probably said this before, but it's not really fair to say that I don't like Keillor. I haven't heard anything on Keillor that grabbed me enough to keep listening to know whether I like it or not!

[Laura Leff] Brad - Oh funny!

[Laura Leff] Maxwell - what format are they now?

[Laura Leff] Just NPR talk?

[Brad from Georgia] Oh, I also wrote the Six-Minute "Macbeth." Probably my most successful bit use on the show, though it was very substantially rewritten!

[Maxwell] All talk.

[Laura Leff] Maxwell - Unfortunate. Give to KCSM. They're all jazz and on the Web.

[Laura Leff] Brad - So how does the writing format of the Keillor show compare to how the Benny show was done?

[ed] same for WUIS

[Brad from Georgia] Keillor does about 80

[Maxwell] Oooh...let me bookmark it. www.kcsm.org /

[Maxwell] ?

[Laura Leff] Of course, Jack didn't take any external material.

[Brad from Georgia] Keillor does about 80

[Brad from Georgia] per cent of the show.

[steve -shimp-] On the highway?

[Laura Leff] Brad - Has he ever gotten a speeding ticket?

[steve -shimp-]  

[Maxwell] On foot.

[Mike Amo]  

[Laura Leff] Maxwell - Highly recommended. I sport a KCSM license plate rim on my car.

[yhtapmys] He'd have to go that fast to get MacBeth in six minutes.

[Brad from Georgia] The rest is now done by a small staff of writers--they don't take freelance any more. Darn it. Paid pretty well. You can't do a per cent sign here, apparently.

[yhtapmys] %

[Maxwell] %

[Laura Leff] %

[steve -shimp-] (*&)(&*^#%

[Mike Amo] %

[Laura Leff] *We* can Brad...

[yhtapmys] We've taken 5% already.

[Brad from Georgia] Keillor told us a story about his having driven himself to the hospital after his stroke. Scary!% Hey, it woiks now!

[Laura Leff] Brad - Did it affect his driving?  

[Brad from Georgia] Oh, I know...this darn netbook. I kept hitting "return" instead of the right shift key, which is ridiculously small.

[yhtapmys] He was going 80.

[Maxwell] On foot.

[Laura Leff] To the emergency room

[Laura Leff] Hey, suddenly it's Mad-Libs!

[Brad from Georgia] LL--He said it didn't. "I drove very carefully to the hospital. I knew something was badly wrong with me, so I kept it just under seventy-five, until I hit the freeway, of course...:

[Maxwell] I was thinking Dragnet myself.

[yhtapmys] Ever tried improv, Laura? You've got to have a good night.

[steve -shimp-] Nice concern for others on the road, if not yourself!

[Laura Leff] Yht - Nah, good night puts me to sleep.

[Brad from Georgia] He wasn't thinking clearly, after all....

[Brad from Georgia] He said "They asked me questions, and I answered them. I knew my name, the date, who the President was. They wrote something on my chart, and I sneaked a look."

[Laura Leff] On a slightly more serious but related note, there's a great video of a neurologist watching herself have a stroke. She fully recovered.

[steve -shimp-] It would be so horrible to die being run over by Garrison Keillor

[Laura Leff] Once again, a natural-born Keillor.

[yhtapmys] Your name would get left out of the obit.

[Brad from Georgia] "Sixty-seven year old man, alert, aware, responsive, and appropriate. How sweet, I thought. I'd always wanted to be appropriate."

[Laura Leff] Kind of like getting run over by an Amish buggy.

[steve -shimp-]  

[Mike Amo]  

[Maxwell] It's not the buggy that gets you. It's the horses.

[steve -shimp-] I'm sure he'd have some very folksy observations on it on the next show

[Brad from Georgia] "So thee wants to drag, dost thou?"

[Maxwell] Quaker Amish?

[Brad from Georgia] It's an old rivalry.

[steve -shimp-] I ran over a Lutheran and they apologized. Now, here's a song about cats.

[Maxwell] I'd rather have Quaker Puffed Rice.

[Brad from Georgia] The Quakers feel their oats and the Amish make furniture at them.

[Laura Leff] http://www.ted.com/talks/lang/eng/ji ... f_insight.html

[Laura Leff] Don't watch it now, but I highly recommend it.

[Maxwell] Speaking of Amish, has anybody seen the ad for the Amish fire place cabinets?

[Laura Leff] Oh, I've seen that.

[Brad from Georgia] Yes. It's a scam.

[Laura Leff] Is it?

[Maxwell] I like the random bale of hay that shows it must be Amish.

[Laura Leff] But...it's a REAL bale of hay!

[Maxwell] My son pointed that out to me.

[Brad from Georgia] Yes. The Amish get ripped off by the company, and the electric heaters are sold for like six times their cost in a Home Depot (without the mantel)

[Maxwell] Did the company at least pay for that bale of hay in the workshop?

[Laura Leff] Yes...that's right...I remember commenting to Dan something about, "Why are the Amish building something electric? This makes no sense."

[Maxwell] They only make the cabinets.

[Brad from Georgia] Hah. That was no bale of hay. It's shredded wheat they stole from the Quakers.

[steve -shimp-]  

[Maxwell]  

[Laura Leff]  

[Mike Amo]  

[Laura Leff] That was no lady...that was my betrothed!

[Maxwell] If I had a cup of Maxwell House, I'd have done a Danny Thomas spit take.

[Brad from Georgia] I read that they're paid a pittance for the cabinets--something like twenty dollars over the material cost. Then the company slaps a cheap electric heater in them and sells them for hundreds of dollars.

[steve -shimp-] Someone once pointed out the eerie resemblance between the Quaker Oats man and Barbara Bush and I can't *NOT* see her when I look at the package.

[Laura Leff] Steve -  

[Brad from Georgia] Want to see my Wilford Brimley impression?

[Laura Leff] At least they didn't think she looked like Rastus or Aunt Jemima.

[Laura Leff] Brad - Sure.

[Brad from Georgia] "Hello, I'm Wilford Brimley. Eat your oatmeal, dammit!"

[Laura Leff] Oh...that reminds me of another ad...with some character actor whose name is escaping me

[Maxwell] One thing about Wilford Brimley: he's been a cranky oldfart for decades.

[yhtapmys] Mason Adams.

[Brad from Georgia] "Dammit, I told you to eat your oatmeal! Now look, you got diabetus."

[Mike Amo] Love Mason Adams

[Laura Leff] Where a father is trying to get his son to eat or do something, and the actor comes in and tells him to eat it dammit

[Laura Leff] No, not Mason Adams.

[yhtapmys] That was Gumby.

[Laura Leff] Crud...

[Maxwell] I was named for a character on a radio soap opera Mason Adams starred it.

[yhtapmys] There was a soap named Maxwell?

[Maxwell] Maxwell is not my real name.

[Laura Leff] As the Maxwell's Engine Turns

[Brad from Georgia] Your real name is...Rolls Canardly.

[Mike Amo] Egbert Hoopledink?

[Brad from Georgia] "It rolls down one hill and canardly get up the next."

[Mike Amo] Englebert's cousin

[Maxwell] I was named for a character on Pepper Young's family.

[Maxwell] Ah Choo.

[Maxwell] He was Pepper Young's offspring.

[yhtapmys] Better than being named 'Pepper'.

[Laura Leff] And her son by an Asian gentleman, Ah So.

[Maxwell] Pepper was a guy.

[Maxwell] Played by Mason Adams.

[Brad from Georgia] Saltan Pepper.

[Brad from Georgia] Sultan Pepper.

[Maxwell] There you go.

[yhtapmys] Ah Skippet.

[Laura Leff] Cay N. Pepper

[Maxwell] Kay N. Pepper.

[Brad from Georgia] Pep Sodent.

[Laura Leff] Sal Hepatica

[yhtapmys] Sal Hepatica.

[yhtapmys] Grrrr.

[Maxwell] I went to school with him.

[Laura Leff] Yht - Jinx!

[Brad from Georgia] Hal Zapatica.

[yhtapmys] I. Pana.

[yhtapmys] There!

[Laura Leff] Howe Zawife

[Mike Amo] for the smile of health

[Laura Leff] N. Kids

[Brad from Georgia] Dewey, Cheatam, and Howe.

[Laura Leff] I.P. Daily

[Maxwell] You mush have a very large bladder.

[Brad from Georgia] Mush is oatmeal, and we're back to Wilford.

[Laura Leff] Mush is a dog command

[Maxwell] Or the Iditerod.

[Laura Leff] In Sarah Palin country

[yhtapmys] I'm going to head out. My light just burned out and I have no replacements.

[Laura Leff] OK, good night Yht!

[Mike Amo] cya yht

[Maxwell] Good night Yht.

[Brad from Georgia] You can see Russia from there. Unless you're a sled dog. Then the view is monotonous.

[yhtapmys] Have a Merry Christmas.

[Laura Leff] Hey, before I forget, any requests for January?

[Mike Amo] you too!

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[Maxwell] Hmmm...

[steve -shimp-] Anything but "The New Tenant" (blecch)

[Mike Amo] I guess a New Years show is in order

[Mike Amo] anything we haven't run?

[Maxwell] Jan. 1 1933 is only a partial show.

[Laura Leff] I don't know if we've run the one where Jack is stood up by his date and ends up celebrating with Rochesterd

[Laura Leff] Oops...spoiler

[Maxwell] 1939.

[steve -shimp-]  

[Brad from Georgia] How about the January 3 45 show? It has Amos and Andy as guests, I think.

[Laura Leff] Is that how Jack found Rochester (no d)?

[steve -shimp-] That'd be fine, or one of the spinoffs or something.

[steve -shimp-] I also have a suggestion maybe for a future chat ...

[Laura Leff] OK...

[steve -shimp-] That we do a TV episode; most of us seem to be reasonably youtube-enabled

[steve -shimp-] We could pick something that's up online to discuss

[Laura Leff] Hmmm...interesting idea.

[steve -shimp-] It'd be a first!

[Maxwell] A lot of the stuff on YouTube is bits.

[Laura Leff] Now, this kind of flies in the face of a previous thought but...

[Laura Leff] Is the TV show where Jack does the radio New Tenant on line?

[steve -shimp-] I think some of the PD episodes are up in full.

[Laura Leff] I have to confess I haven't gotten around to seeing it.

[Maxwell] I don't know, but I have it on two different DVDs.

[steve -shimp-] Maybe. I have it on DVD as well.

[Laura Leff] Oh I've got the show,

[Laura Leff] Just wondering if it's already up online.

[Brad from Georgia] No, I was wrong--it isn't 45. The first one in 45 is Jack in the train station, on Jan. 7. Next week is from NY with Fred Allen as guest.

[steve -shimp-] Check archive.org

[Laura Leff] Brad - OK, that sounds right to me.

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[Laura Leff] Well, but you didn't want to do New Tenant, so maybe that's not a good idea.

[Brad from Georgia] So maybe the Jan 14 45 show? Or the Jan 7 train station one?

[Laura Leff] Steve - You want to take an assignment to find a full show online?

[Laura Leff] Brad - I think we must have done 1/7/45 at some point...

[Brad from Georgia] Okay. I'll be satisfied with any of 'em, really.

[Mike Amo] If there is one other than The New Tenant, that'll be fine. I also enjoy hearing more of the ones from the mid-30s

[Laura Leff] But probably not 1/14/45

[steve -shimp-] Two versions of the Rochester and Jack alone on New Years are on archive.org, but not the radio re-creation of the new tentant.

[Brad from Georgia] Or is there a New Year's guest shot by Jack on someoen else's show?

[Laura Leff] Mike - I do too, but no one ever seems to enjoy them when we discuss them here. So I'm shy of posting them.

[Brad from Georgia] someone.

[Laura Leff] Brad - Hmmm...I'll have to take a look.

[Laura Leff] Does archive.org have video as well?

[Brad from Georgia] Well, I like the New Tenant. It reminds me of Garrison Keillor.:p

[Mike Amo] For me, they were a lot more spontaneous and unpredictable

[Laura Leff] Brad - Touche.

[Brad from Georgia] My smiley dinnt woik.  

[Laura Leff] Mike - And that's why I like them, too. Totally understood.

[Mike Amo] Will be content with whatever the collective rules  

[steve -shimp-] Hang on: http://www.archive.org/details/Jack_ ... Years_Day_1956

[steve -shimp-] that's the radio re-creation, available to stream

[Laura Leff] Is it video or just audio?

[steve -shimp-] video

[Brad from Georgia] You know, there was a Jack memorial that I recorded off TV the year he died...on audiotape. Wonder if I still have it.

[Laura Leff] Brad - NBC or CBS?

[Laura Leff] Was it 15 minutes or 45?

[Brad from Georgia] 45, I'm pretty sure.

[Laura Leff] CBS. It's in the video library if you want the visuals to go with it. One of the first things I transferred.

[Brad from Georgia] Morley Safer? I can't remember! I remember it concluded with the Gisele McKenzie/Jack duet.

[Brad from Georgia] That was a sad Christmas....

[Laura Leff] Um...no...heavy bald guy...Charles Kuralt I think?

[Brad from Georgia] Yeh, Kuralt!

[Laura Leff] Been a while since I watched it though.

[Brad from Georgia] "And once more, oh just once more, let's hear the duet with Gisele...."

[Laura Leff] The video's not great, but it's in color.

[Maxwell] Easy to confuse Kuralt with Safer. They had the same voice.

 [Laura Leff] OK...so are we OK going with that TV show? If New Tenant makes people wretch, we can look for something else.

[Brad from Georgia] TV show sounds fine to me, but I'm easy with whatever you choose.

[steve -shimp-] It's the New Tenant, but it's very interesting in that it's a recreation of how they did the radio show on TV.

[steve -shimp-] So, I'd be game.

[Laura Leff] OK, cool. Let's go with that then.

[Maxwell] I'm good with it.

[Mike Amo] Works for me

[steve -shimp-] New decade, so a new medium for the chat!

 [Maxwell] We'll come up with a better one for tonight.

 [Brad from Georgia] Gonna turn in. Gotta give that exam tomorrow! Goodnight, folks.

[steve -shimp-] OK, me too. Good night all!

[Mike Amo] Merry Christmas, Brad!

[Laura Leff] OK, let's call it a wrap for this month?

[Maxwell] Yeah, I have to be up at 4:30, so I'm gonna hit the rack.

[steve -shimp-] Good night, happy holidays all around...

[Laura Leff] Thanks for joining us, Brad!

[Brad from Georgia] And Merry Christmas to you all! And Happy Hannukah as well, if I spelled it right.

[Mike Amo] And good health to all from Rexall!

[Laura Leff] Chanukkah

[Mike Amo] ty Brad

[Maxwell] Happy Holidays.

[Maxwell] That covers everybody.

[Laura Leff] All the best to all of you!

[Mike Amo] Chanukah or Mxyptlk

User Brad from Georgia has logged out.

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[Mike Amo] And Festivus

[Laura Leff] And Kwanzaa

[Mike Amo]  

[Mike Amo] Nite LL

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[Laura Leff] Night!