IJBFC Chat - June 12, 2005

(Name of message originator in <> brackets at the beginning of each line;  lines starting with > are originated by Laura Leff)

<Steve "shimp"> LOL Brad, there's always Ted Turner tho

<KayLhota> tropical storms are crummy and all, but earthquakes scare me

<Maxwell> Humid here, too but we need rain.

<Maxwell> Hey LL!

> Hello again everyone!

<KayLhota> Hi Laura

<Steve "shimp"> Hi LL

<Brad from Georgia> The quake was 4.0, centered near Palm Springs. Called Eddie Carroll to see if it was bad, and he said "Just routine."

<Brad from Georgia> Hiya, LL!

<Maxwell> Believe it or not, I was actually able to download the program this month with no problems!

> Maxwell - Rah!

[Sun Jun 12 16:06:42 GMT-08:00 2005] Alex Buck1: Fan From Kansas City

<Brad from Georgia> I listened to it twice!

<Maxwell> Sorry, anytime the earth trembles beneath my feet, it isn't routine.

<Steve "shimp"> I just pulled it from my own collection, did you post fake mary or dub Mary?

<Brad from Georgia> LL, I just want to say the recording this month is so nice, so great, so nice, so great, so nice, so great...

<Alex Buck1> Weird. I got bumped off and then it wouldn't let me use my name.

> Steve - Fake Mary

<Maxwell> Happens to me all the time, Alex.

<Steve "shimp"> who has never been identified?

> Alex - It's still got you on the room, so it won't allow a name dupe

> Steve - I think it's Jeanette Eyemann.

<Brad from Georgia> Ah, the Mary who dares not speak her name.

<KayLhota> I had it, but I never listened to it until Laura picked it for this months chat

> Kay - Hey, I just saw you in a photo that I downloaded from my camera.

<Brad from Georgia> I've heard it before--it was one of the first JB tapes I bought years ago.

<Alex Buck1> So what was up with the fake Mary?

> BRB...apologies

<Steve "shimp"> Me too Brad, old "Metacom" put that out..

<Alex Buck1> Having someone else play seemed to cheapen the character for me

<Brad from Georgia> Mary had mike fright badly toward the end of the show, and she usually recorded her lines at home. A stand-in read the lines for the audience, then they spliced Mary in.

<KayLhota> Smy first JB tape that I bought was the James Stewart episode from Jan 1949

<Brad from Georgia> That the "Bend of the River" one, Kay?

<Steve "shimp"> I had that one on an old cassette too, Kay..

<KayLhota> no, it's the lunch at the Brown Derby episode

<Alex Buck1> So was this months program a raw recording without Mary being dubbed in?

<Brad from Georgia> Oh, right, I remember that one, Kay.

<Steve "shimp"> Yep, appears to be so Alex. But it seems complete otherwise...

<Maxwell> Mary just wasn't herself that week.

<Steve "shimp"> Groan!

<Alex Buck1> Hmm, so there's one out there with Mary, eh? Interesting

<KayLhota> I haven't heard many of the 50's episodes

<Brad from Georgia> I understand Jack usually told the audience that Mary had a cold or some such as the excuse.

> I'm back

<Steve "shimp"> How did the Boston gig go, Laura?

> Alex - Yes, I have the one with Mary's lines edited in as well. It's strange to hear the two versions.

<Alex Buck1> They seemed to go to a lot of trouble saying that it was the last program of the season but never came out and said the last radio program period.

> Steve - It was great! Did you see the photos from Waukegan too?

> Steve - You ought to ask Kay about it!

<Brad from Georgia> Alex, they may not have known at that point that it was the last radio program.

<Steve "shimp"> No, I just saw you posted them but haven't looked at them yet..

<Steve "shimp"> You could have said it was LAME and I wouldn't feel bad about not driving the 600 miles up for it!

<Alex Buck1> I don't remember hearing Jack going to such extremes to thank everyone as he did in this show

<KayLhota> yes, I'll be glad to tell how nice it was to have a Jack Benny Fan event in the Boston area

<Maxwell> I'm considering suing Waukeegan for having it before school got out, so I couldn't be there.

<KayLhota> and how pleasant the dinner was and how nice it was to ask Kay Linaker about "Buck Benny"

> This was one of the first JB shows that I heard, so I didn't know the significance of many things at that time. Like Mahlon Merrick instead of Bob Crosby.

<Steve "shimp"> Next time I'll brave I-95 northwards!

<Steve "shimp"> Where was Bob?

<KayLhota> you won't regret it. Boston isn't scary.

<Brad from Georgia> Don mentioned Bob Crosby in the opening announcement, but he didn't seem to be on the show.

> Kay - Brookline is even less scary.

<Maxwell> Lots of Mel Blanc, though.

<Steve "shimp"> I live in a town where people wear wigs and shoot cannonballs. Nothing scares me.

<Alex Buck1> I thought Bob was pretty milk-toast until I heard Mahlon

> I have to wonder if this is a recording of a rehearsal show.

<Alex Buck1> Things did seem pretty loose

<Brad from Georgia> Jack's ad-lib still cracks me up: "Not with THAT reading, they don't!"

> I'm going to have to do a side-by-side with the one with Mary included

> Don seems so serious in the opening announcement, as he is in rehearsal shows I've heard.

<Alex Buck1> Did they have a live audience for rehersals though?

> I liked Kitzel's ad lib!

<Steve "shimp"> Also noticed some crosstalk of Jack in the last commercial, like Jack critiquing the performances.

<Brad from Georgia> LL--was that the song?

> Alex - I've heard what purport to be rehearsals that have laughter/audiences.

> Steve - That's it exactly. I've heard Jack sort of "make fun" of Don on rehearsals.

> Brad - Yup, his exit singing.

> Brad - Jack then says something about, "No use writing anything, they'll do what they want."

<Alex Buck1> They kept talking about Jack going on a trip but they never said where he was going

<Maxwell> Kitzel's singing cracked me up.

<Brad from Georgia> Good repeated gag--"Full-blooded, I'm not."

<Brad from Georgia> Alex, wasn't he going to Las Vegas?

<Alex Buck1> Oh you're right

> I was also struck at the applause under Dennis' praise for Jack.

<Alex Buck1> Did Rochester actually have a Vegas act?

> Alex - The Flamingo.

<Maxwell> Yeah, he was staying at the Falmingo. (Product placement)

> Alex - Not that I'm aware of.

<Steve "shimp"> So, was it finalized that there would be no "next season" when this aired?

<Brad from Georgia> Spiked shoes so if he wins something, he can leave fast....

> Steve - I'm not sure, and I've had a lot of people ask that over the years.

<Maxwell> You'd think if they knew they'd have said something.

> I can imagine that Jack wouldn't want to do the weekly radio show and the biweekly television show.

<Steve "shimp"> It wasn't as common in those days to have a big "finale" in the way sitcoms do now

<Brad from Georgia> Didn't sound as if they knew it was the final show--Jack didn't say it was "the last show of the program."

<Steve "shimp"> Also the reruns would continue

> It may not have been absolutely decided yet. Hopefully I'll find a smoking gun document somewhere someday. Probably a little late to find a Deep Throat on the subject.

<Maxwell> Didn't they play reruns for a few years after the last new show/

<Brad from Georgia> By 1955, though, the big radio shows were rapidly edging toward extinction...

> Maxwell - Yes, "The Best of Benny"

> I also wonder if it might sound like Jack was winding down his career to make a big deal out of his leaving radio.

<Brad from Georgia> Hmmm..."The Best of Benny." So they reran ALL the shows, then?

<Maxwell> CBS held on longer than just about anyone with network programming, iirc.

> They might have wanted it to sound like a natural transition to television.

<Steve "shimp"> He definitely says we'll SEE you in the fall...cryptic hint?

<KayLhota> I remember reading Stqan Freburg's book years ago about how he had the summer program after Jack Benny's last season

> Brad - Not all of them...*grabbing for 39 Forever 1st edition*...

<Maxwell> Could be.

<KayLhota> I wish I remembered better about what he said

<Brad from Georgia> LL--Oh, for heaven's sake, I was JOKING!

<Brad from Georgia> (you have to imagine me doing a perfect Benny impression)

<Maxwell> Now cut that out!

<Brad from Georgia> Well!

> Brad - Sorry...I get a lot of questions! But the oldest I see on Best of Benny are from 1952.

<Brad from Georgia> That was a good show, LL--I like those end-of-the-season loosey-goosey programs.

<Steve "shimp"> On a related note to "Best of Benny", when did they start circulating the abridged AFRS broadcasts?

> I was thinking that part of the reason that the Mary substitute is "bad" is because she needed to give enough break before her lines for laughter to die. You couldn't have her timing on the laugh

> because to edit in Mary's line would require cutting off the laugh.

> Steve - The AFRS discs were around in the 1940s because they had to be sent to the stations for broadcast. As far as when they were transferred to tape for circulation, that was probably the 70s.

<Steve "shimp"> It's also interesting that fake Mary is in the simultaneous group dialog at the end, they couldn't have edited her in there...

<Steve "shimp"> Interesting on AFRS! Thanks.

<Brad from Georgia> I've been listening to 1941/42 on my daily walks. On many I can clearly hear when the record is changed.

> Steve - Remind me what that was...I can listen to it in the one with Mary's lines dubbed.

<Steve "shimp"> Just a quick "yes" or something when Jack praises the cast

> Brad - Yes, you'll sometimes hear a sharp stop in applause, etc.

> Steve - I'll have to listen to that again.

<Steve "shimp"> Not big.

<Steve "shimp"> I think they left the stand-in in, if my memory serves

> And Sammy the drummer sounds like he really is played by Sammy Weiss.

<Brad from Georgia> Steve--I think you're right. It's not very long.

> It's a strange joke for radio, because Sammy was a really big guy. The audience can see that, but on radio you can't necessarily tell that.

<Brad from Georgia> And was that Remley or Twombly who fell off the stool?

> Brad - Maybe both? :)

<KayLhota> LOL

<Maxwell> Didn't Twombly get the blame?

<Steve "shimp"> Was Mahlon Merrick the real Mahlon, or a sub like Mel as Twombly?

<Steve "shimp"> Man, you need a scorecard to tell all the impostors!

<Brad from Georgia> Just reread Mel Blanc's memoir, "That's NOT All, Folks," and was surprised that Eugene Twombly was a real person! It sounds so made-up.

<Steve "shimp"> Twombly was married to Bea Benaderet!

> Steve - I'm pretty sure it was Mahlon.

<KayLhota> I'll have to read that again

<KayLhota> I never knew that.

> Brad/Steve - Sure was!

<Alex Buck1> Bea Twombly?

> Gene and Bea died just days apart. A real Hollywood heartbreaker.

<Brad from Georgia> Then again, when I'm in NYC, I stay at the Hotel Excelsior. Sounds like something from a rassafrackin' Looney Tune.

<Steve "shimp"> Yep, on her gravestone.

<KayLhota> I remember when Bea Benedaret passed away

> Steve - Really? Is that how she's listed?

<Maxwell> So do I.

<KayLhota> they had written her out of Petticoat Junction

<Alex Buck1> what time frame would that have been?

<Brad from Georgia> Yes, I remember, too.

<Maxwell> Wrote in June Lockhart.

<Steve "shimp"> I think it is one of those with the surname in large script and the first names in small apart from it.

<Steve "shimp"> It's on findagrave or one of those websites, I've seen it.

<Alex Buck1> cancer?

> Steve - I'll have to look for it.

<Brad from Georgia> It was 1968. I just checked IMDB.

> Speaking of gravestones...has anyone had a chance to look at the Waukegan photos yet?

<Brad from Georgia> Alex--yes, cancer.

<Maxwell> Not yet.

<Brad from Georgia> LL--Not yet. Will right after the chat.

<Maxwell> I'm still pouting because I couldn't make it.

> Well, you'll find that planting the Jack Benny Tree was not all we did in Waukegan.

<Brad from Georgia> LL--"Wild in Waukegan," eh?

<Steve "shimp"> The tree's still alive, (crosses fingers), right?

<KayLhota> let's hope it stays alive for a long long time

> Steve - As far as I know!

<Maxwell> So far I haven't seen any headlines "Jack Benny Tree Dead."

> Kay - That's much what I said at the ceremony. Something like, "May this tree live for centuries, and may people be laughing at Jack Benny's humor just as long."

> Maxwell - Dead Again.

<Maxwell> "Jack Benny Tree Redies"

<Steve "shimp"> Hear hear!

<KayLhota> May they indeed, Laura.

<Maxwell> My sentiments exactly.

<Brad from Georgia> What Kay said.

<Steve "shimp"> If I planted that tree, it would be dead, I have a definite black thumb!

<Steve "shimp"> Cacti fear me

> You know, they planted another tree on the same spot as the original Jack Benny tree. And lightning hit it and it almost fell on the then-Mayor's car!

<Maxwell> You and me both, Steve.

<Brad from Georgia> Bark Benny Rides Again.

<Maxwell> Was that Sabonjian?

> BRB again...

<Maxwell> He was mayor there for about 700 years.

<Steve "shimp"> I was trying to think up some funny kinds of trees that would be appropriate

<Steve "shimp"> but couldn't think of any good comical ones.

<Alex Buck1> i hate it when elves mess our politics

[Sun Jun 12 16:33:16 GMT-08:00 2005] Kay Lhota: typical movie fan

<Alex Buck1> with our politics

<Alex Buck1> well, mess on our politics too

<Kay Lhota> I got bounced, and couldn't come back in because the name KayLhota was already taken. Ugh!

<Steve "shimp"> Elves have left the building?

<Alex Buck1> Kay - been there done that

<Maxwell> It is a common occurence.

<Kay Lhota> good to know, Alex. We're having modem problems, and we've been bouncing in and out a lot.

<Brad from Georgia> Mine's behaving, for a change.

> Maxwell - No, it wasn't Sabonjian. I think it's mentioned in the News-Sun article.

<Maxwell> Comcast was giving me fits through most of March.

<Kay Lhota> Laura, should I remind you about the damaged book?

<Maxwell> He's the only mayor from Waukegan that I know.

<Alex Buck1> Well, I've got to cut out early tonight. Our baby is due Wednesday and there are still some honey-do items on the list

<Steve "shimp"> Points for knowing ANY mayor of Waukegan, Max!

> Kay - Yes! Thank you.

<Maxwell> So long, Alex.

<Alex Buck1> We'll catch up with your all next month

<Brad from Georgia> Mazeltov, Alex!

<Kay Lhota> Good luck, is this your first?

<Steve "shimp"> Good luck with baby, Alex!

> Alex - Good luck to all of you, Alex!

<Kay Lhota> kisses to the mother to be, and you yourself!

<Alex Buck1> We have a 3 year old boy and this will be his first sister

<Kay Lhota> aww!

<Alex Buck1> I tried to get my wife to entertain the idea of Mary or Sadie as a name but she wasn't too excited about it

<Maxwell> Enjoy them. They grow up fast.

> Alex - How about Gracie?

> I know another member who did that.

<Steve "shimp"> Meh, Sadie didn't like it either!

> Or Jacqueline

<Brad from Georgia> Well, my two boys are Jack and Benny.

<Alex Buck1> Well, Grace is the name we're thinking about as a middle name

<Steve "shimp"> LL, I've got a niece named Gracie, with a potential brother on the way. I'm gunning for George!

<Kay Lhota> LOL

> If it's twins, you can call them Mabel and Gertrude.

<Kay Lhota> oh gosh!

<Brad from Georgia> (Naw, not really--Jonathan's my son, Amy's my little girl)

<Kay Lhota> My oldest son is named Jonathan as well.

> Brad - Psych!

<Alex Buck1> You see, our son's name is Nathaniel and my little inside joke would have been to name our daughter Gracie

<Alex Buck1> Since George's real name was Nathan

> Our kids are named Rocco and Vov.

> They're rabbits.

<Alex Buck1> Nat Birnbaum, I believe

<Alex Buck1> But my wife wouldn't go for it

<Brad from Georgia> My boy wrote a series of radio plays--Mildly Exciting Tales of Astonishment--recently. I performed in one last night--I was a superhero named Odd Doc who talks a bit like Jonathan Harris.

> Brad - Not Jonathan Frakes?

<Alex Buck1> At any rate, we'll catch up with you all real soon.

<Brad from Georgia> LL--Oh, the pain, the pain!

> Again, good luck Alex!

<Steve "shimp"> Bye Alex, best wishes!

<Kay Lhota> yes, good luck

<Kay Lhota> hugs

> Say, you know that line from tonight's show about "People can't smoke while they're holding their nose"?

> That was originally a Fred Allen line.

<Steve "shimp"> Yep

<Kay Lhota> it's a great line

<Brad from Georgia> I just got it!

<Steve "shimp"> Fred always sounded like he was holding his nose!

<Steve "shimp"> A non smoker?

> Steve - Har har...true!

<Kay Lhota> I heard that Fred Allen was a teetoteler.

<Brad from Georgia> I love Jack's impression of Allen--"Let me put on my clothespin...."

> Kay - Joe did me the favor of giving me his cold in Boston, so that and starting a new job has kept me completely under it this week.

> Kay - I think that's right (FA = teetotaler)

<Kay Lhota> oh, I'm sorry to hear that

> Brad - And Jack did a very good FA impersonation!

<Maxwell> When Jack Eigen interviewed Jack Benny in the '60s in Chicago, Jack did his Fred Allen imitation. Pretty funny.

<Brad from Georgia> LL--He did indeed. And a pretty good Jackie Gleason, too!

<Maxwell> "It's not that Jack Benny is tight. It's just that he has short arms and deep pockets."

> Brad - You ought to see him in full Gleason with Audrey Meadows!

<Kay Lhota> you can tell that Jack loved Fred Allen to do the impression like he did

<Steve "shimp"> Probably better than Cedric the Entertainer anyway, Brad!

> Impersonation is the sincerest form of flattery...

<Brad from Georgia> "When Jack plays his violin, he makes you wish the strings were back inside the cat."

<Steve "shimp"> Unless you're an identity thief!

> Steve - Was Cedric really trying to do Gleason? Or trying to make the role his own?

<Steve "shimp"> Oh, I'm not paying the $8 to find out, LL!

<Brad from Georgia> BTW, I'm excited. I've persuaded my college to host Eddie Carroll in "Laughter in Bloom," date still to be decided.

> Steve - I hear that.

<Maxwell> As a huge fan of gleason (nearly 300 lb), I'm not interested in finding out.

<Steve "shimp"> Hey, cool, Brad!

> Brad - Excellent! I'm sure Eddie appreciates that. As will Benny fans in your area.

<Steve "shimp"> Keep us posted, I could actually drive to GA

<Brad from Georgia> Thought my college president might balk at the idea of a "popular" performance, but she was excited. She looked at Eddie's photo and said, "He looks like Jack Benny."

<Brad from Georgia> I said, "Sister, you ain't heard nothing yet." Probably a mistake on my part...

> Brad - Much more so than most Benny impressionists, for my money!

> Brad - No no...that's Al Jolson.

<Maxwell> You beat me to that one LL.

<Steve "shimp"> I'd like to throw that line on the chair of my dept here!

<Steve "shimp"> That's a coconut, Eddie's on the left...

<Maxwell> Your dept. only has oen chair? People must get tired standing around all day.

<Brad from Georgia> LL--LOL! When I first saw Eddie perform, my initial thought was "He doesn't look that much like Jack." Ten minutes later, he looked exactly like Jack.

> Maxwell - Ba dum BUM!

<Steve "shimp"> Max, budget cuts, you know!

<Maxwell> (Imagine that spoken as Dennis Day.)

<Brad from Georgia> I'll let everyone know when the date is set. Right now the theater manager is off on vacation, so everything's at a standstill.

> Brad - When you've seen as many really BAD Benny impersonators as I have, he looks like Jack. Then again, I've seen where people have accidentally used photos of Eddie in

> place of photos of Jack.

> There's even a commercially-produced video that has a Jack Benny feature...and EDDIE'S picture is on the box!

<Brad from Georgia> Eddie plays the role wonderfully. I swear after five minutes, you think that's Jack on stage.

<Steve "shimp"> That's just...wrong!

> Even Variety wrote up the 39 Forever convention, and used a portrait of Eddie instead of a picture of Jack.

<Steve "shimp"> I'm definitely looking forward to catching Eddie's show sometime.

<Brad from Georgia> Did you know that on one of the "Marx Brothers Go West" posters, an imposter posed as Groucho, who didn't want to be photographed that day?

> I can pretty much (so far) always tell a picture or painting of Jack vs. a picture or painting of Eddie as Jack.

<Maxwell> I'd heard that, but I never saw the poster.

> Brad - No! Really? I didn't know that.

<Kay Lhota> I'd heard that Groucho had a cold, so screenwriter Irving Brecher stepped in that day

> *Combing memory for Go West pictures*

<Brad from Georgia> Yes--I've seen the poster, and it's obviously not Grouch.

> Is the poster on line?

<Kay Lhota> I've heard about it, but I've never seen one where I could swear for sure

<Maxwell> They should have taken a picture of Chico or Harpo as Groucho.

> You probably have all heard the story about Chico and Harpo switching roles in a stage performance.

<Brad from Georgia> LL--Don't think so--I saw it in a collection of posters. Maxwell, you're right. I've seen a photo in which everyone but Groucho is made up as Groucho. He looks like Chico.

> All I can think of are lobby cards for "Go West".

<Maxwell> In Duck Soup, the only way you can tell Chico is from his fake accent, and the only way you can tell Harpo is the eyes.

> Those being stills from the movie, of course they're Groucho.

<Brad from Georgia> IIRC, this was a full poster, and the boys are lined up totem-pole style on the left, "Groucho" on top.

<Steve "shimp"> That probably brings some bucks on ebay!

> Darn...no poster on IMDB.

<Brad from Georgia> Well, not as much as the misprinted poster for "Duck Soup," with Harpo upside down. Joking again, I'm joking....

<Kay Lhota> LOL

> Brad - I've seen photos of them doing that as far back as vaudeville days.

<Steve "shimp"> Is he in the little airplane?

> Just to make a Benny connection, I got a copy of a photo of the Barrison Theatre where Jack first met the Marxes when he was playing in the pit.

<Brad from Georgia> I have an autographed Groucho photo from my dear dim days in college. I was on the cinema committee, and we invited him to come to the university.

<Brad from Georgia> He couldn't come, but sent us all autographed 8x10s.

> You can definitely tell that this was one of the lesser, four-a-day or more theatres.

> Brad - Wow! Good for you! When was that?

<Steve "shimp"> Interesting, LL, I wonder about the theaters where vaudeville played out

<Brad from Georgia> Let's see...1966 or 67, I'd guess.

<Kay Lhota> wow. He did perform at a college in Iowa in 1972.

> Brad - Not quite the waning years, but definitely when he was on a downswing.

<Maxwell> That must have been about the time he was doing that one-man show.

> Kay - I think he did Carnegie Hall in 1972 as well.

<Brad from Georgia> Yes, he'd had some health problems not long before.

<Maxwell> I have the Carnegie Hall recording.

<Maxwell> So, yes, he did.

<Kay Lhota> yes, the Iowa college gig was a warmup for the Carnegie Hall concert

<Brad from Georgia> Maxwell--so do I. "It doesn't exist anymore. And hardly do I."

> Steve - They vary widely. I've been in the Orpheum Theatre in San Francisco that Jack mentions regularly on the radio shows. It's still a palace.

<Maxwell> His accompanist was Marvin Hamlisch...before he got those Oscars.

> Steve - Er...so to speak.

> Groucho even mentions Jack in the Carnegie Hall concert.

<Maxwell> Right.

> Groucho gave Marvin Hamlisch the duck from "You Bet Your Life" for that gig.

<Steve "shimp"> Yep, the Orpheum is nice, I've been there too.

<Brad from Georgia> Eddie Carroll tells me that a theater in Cucamonga (now Rancho Cucamonga) is poised to reopen...and "Laughter in Bloom" will be the inaugural show.

<Steve "shimp"> I wonder more about the dives, though!

> Brad - That's great!

<Brad from Georgia> Steve "Nacogdoches is full of roaches..."

> Steve - You've probably heard Fred Allen's cracks about those.

<Steve "shimp"> Yeah, bits here and there.

> Benny was playing so far out in the woods that the theatre was a cave. The stage manager was a bear.

<Kay Lhota> LOL

<Steve "shimp"> I wonder how many seats there were, proximity to the stage, that kind of thing.

<Steve "shimp"> I kind of drift toward the lowbrow in life myself, I'd probably see Jack in the cave!

> Steve - This place had to be pretty small. I'll publish the photo eventually, but I wouldn't guess that you'd get more than 100-200 people in this shack.

<Steve "shimp"> But, that's a plus in many ways, IMO. I know, not classy!

<Brad from Georgia> I saw an old vaudeville house in Michigan--200 seats on the main level, 125 in the balcony. And a Houdini poster still up on one wall! Man, I wish the owner hadn't been with me.

> Jack once called Lincoln, Nebraska vaudeville something like "the toilet of the US"

Joan Rivers had a good bit about playing Nebraska -
> She said her opening act was a magician, and they applauded, then took him out and burned him as a witch!
<Kay Lhota> LOL
<Laura Leff> Steve - LOL
<Brad from Georgia> Oh, almost forgot--I had an operation two weeks ago in St. Joseph's Hospital in
Atlanta......they loved me in St. Joe.
<Maxwell> LOL
<Kay Lhota> LOL Brad
<Laura Leff> Brad - Wah wah wah wahhhhhh
<Brad from Georgia> It's true, though. I type this standing up. The rest I leave to your imagination.
<Maxwell> I've had that one.
> Brad, on another note, where was the Vaudeville house in Mich?
<Laura Leff> Brad - A little too much rotten fruit, perhaps...
<Brad from Georgia> Maxwell--Real pain in the you-know, isn't it?
<Maxwell> You've got that right.
<Brad from Georgia> LL-It was the Orpheum (I think) in Marshall. It's on the second floor of a block of stores and is abandoned--no seats, but the essentials are all there. Someone stole most of the wood from the stage!

> Oh heck...can I get the last screen page E-mailed from someone? Thanks.

> Just refreshed.

<Maxwell> Mine refressed just recently, too.

> I lost it after...ahem..."the toilet of the US"

<Steve "shimp"> On the way LL

<Brad from Georgia> > LL-It was the Orpheum (I think) in Marshall. It's on the second floor of a block of stores and is abandoned--no seats, but the essentials are all there. (to repeat)

<Maxwell> That's pronounced "twa-LAY."

<Kay Lhota> okay, I was about to, but if Steve has it, I'll not worry

> Brad - Wow! And I've even been in Marshall. Maybe I should go back.

<Brad from Georgia> Except someone stole all the flooring from the stage!

<Steve "shimp"> Hey Brad, that reminds me, are you the same Brad who continues the work of another JB?

<Brad from Georgia> It's on the south side of the main street. Marshall consists of mostly antique stores. Steve--Yes, I am.

<Steve "shimp"> The Marshall is too much of a coinkidink

<Steve "shimp"> I like that other JB, too!

<Brad from Georgia> Lovely little town, Steve.

<Steve "shimp"> Yeah, I grew up in Mich, and have been to Marshall a few times.

<Brad from Georgia> Steve: So do I. I've just agreed to do two more books, by the way.

> It's a shame that more of the vaudeville theatres don't exist today. But a lot of them were pretty small places.

<Steve "shimp"> Cool, congrats! I have to say I haven't read your books but I will now!

<Brad from Georgia> But this isn't about me. No, really. You're too kind. Thank you, thank you.

> Brad - Star Trek?

<Brad from Georgia> LL--No, John Bellairs. Great YA writer.

> YA?

<Steve "shimp"> GREAT writer!

<Brad from Georgia> Young adult.

<Steve "shimp"> House with a Clock in its Walls was a big favorite of mine.

<Brad from Georgia> LL-Try "The House With a Clock in Its Walls."

<Brad from Georgia> Steve, you beat me to it.

> Hmmm...not familiar with him.

> I read more Judy Blume myself.

<Brad from Georgia> If you're ever in Marshall, go to a bookstore called the Kid's Place. You'll learn all about John Bellairs. His "Face in the Frost" is one of my favorite books.

<Steve "shimp"> What is it with the JBs!

<Maxwell> I never read anything like that. I was reading Mark Twain when I was in fifth grade. More to my taste.

<Steve "shimp"> Kind of a Michigan JK Rowling!

<Maxwell> "Anything like that" = YA type books.

> I've noticed a crossover between fans of Jack Benny and other intensely blue-eyed actors, like Anthony Hopkins.

<Brad from Georgia> Steve--Exactly! JK Rowling once told me she was inspired by reading "House" before she ever stared "Harry Potter."

<Kay Lhota> really?

<Steve "shimp"> JB as Hannibal Lecter?

<Kay Lhota> a chilling thought.

<Brad from Georgia> Hmmm...fava beans are SO expensive...

<Maxwell> Hmmm...Paul Newman....Jack Benny in Hombre or Hud.

<Steve "shimp"> Nice, Brad! Say Hi to the Richest woman in the world for me next time you're chatting!

> I want a room where I can see a tree, or even water, and Rochester can drive me around in the Maxwell...

<Steve "shimp"> ROFLMAO LL

<Brad from Georgia> Steve--I got ONE lousy chance to talk to her. And did she want to talk about me? No, it was Bellairs, Bellairs, Bellairs....

> On tonight's Yesterday USA stint, Walden blindsided me with a question about my top three favorite movies.

<Steve "shimp"> Wel, you put on some big shoes!

<Steve "shimp"> Well

> I didn't want to admit that "Silence of the Lambs" was probably one of them!

<Steve "shimp"> It is one of my favs, too LL, no need to fear.

> Steve - Ah...I feel so much better.

<Brad from Georgia> Saw one of my favorites last night, "The Big Sleep." I'd forgotten it doesn't make a darn bit of sense.

<Maxwell> That's what makes it so much fun!

<Steve "shimp"> Some of the best ones don't make sense!

<Maxwell> In college we spent hours trying to figure out what the hell it meant.

> When he asked me the question, my eyes immediately went to our DVD collection. I figured that "Silence" and "Pulp Fiction" were bad answers.

<Brad from Georgia> Who killed the chauffeur? William Faulkner called Raymond Chandler, and HE didn't know!\

> Brad - I don't think I've ever seen that one.

<Kay Lhota> LOL Brad

<Kay Lhota> The Big Sleep is a lot of fun. I was too busy to watch last night, but I have been meaning to see the DVD

<Kay Lhota> they showed both versions of the movie last night on TCM

> So OK, as long as the conversation is loose and everyone's OK with that...

<Steve "shimp"> So, LL, what were your big 3 movies?

<Maxwell> And I missed it!

<Brad from Georgia> Bacall to Bogie: "I like horse races, but I have to know the jockey. Are you one of those who likes to come from ... behind?"

> What is the answer to that for everyone else? What are your top movies?

<Kay Lhota> I can't narrow it down to four!

> Steve - I pretty much ducked the question. The only thing that came to mind that I thought I could say was "Yellow Submarine".

<Steve "shimp"> Ok, now I know why you felt blindsided!

<Steve "shimp"> I couldn't pick.

> Brad - Is that really a line from the movie?

<Maxwell> I know Citizen Kane is my favorite, but I have no idea what I'd choose after that.

<Brad from Georgia> Let me see..."Babes in Toyland" with Laurel and Hardy..."Duck Soup"...."Sleepless in Seattle." LL--Surprisingly, yes!

> That's just it. I can think of lots of movies that I love, but it's hard to say which are in the top three.

> Max - There's a great example. Kane is a fabulous movie and I've watched it a million times. But is it in my top 3?

<Kay Lhota> My son Daniel saw Duck Soup for the first time all the way through last Thursday night on TCM

<Steve "shimp"> There's no coherence for me, I like "Village of the Giants" and psychotic Ingmar Bergman movies too

<Brad from Georgia> For years after I saw "Sleepless in Seattle," I kept hoping some woman would tell me my butt was cute. Not even the nurses in St. Joseph's did....and they loved me there.

<Maxwell> It is for me because it blew me away the first time I saw it.

<Steve "shimp"> Any list would reveal my schizophrenia!

> I mentioned it to Dan and he immediately said, "Annie Hall and The Seven Samurai". I LOVE both those movies, but top three? Maybe not.

> Kay - How did he like it?

<Kay Lhota> I haven't seen him laugh that hard in a long time

> Steve - Have some Wild Strawberries?

<Brad from Georgia> LL--I love "Seven Samurai," too. My favorite movies change from moment to moment.

<Steve "shimp"> Or anything with Liv Ullman screaming and gnashing a lot. I like "feel bad" movies now & then!

<Brad from Georgia> Walt Disney Presents: Snow White and the Seven Samurai

> Brad - LOL!!!!

> Toshiro Mifune as Dopey?

<Kay Lhota> duck Soup isn't my favorite Marx Brothers film, but I love the Marx Brothers

> Steve - I read that as Liv Tyler screaming and gnashing. She whispers a lot in Lord of the Rings.

<Maxwell> Duck Soup is my favorite Marx Bros.

<Brad from Georgia> Duck Soup is my sentimental favorite. When my wife and I were first dating, we saw it and I proposed to her. She slapped me.

> Kay - So what is your favorite? Mine's Horse Feathers.

<Steve "shimp"> LOL Brad

<Kay Lhota> Horse Feathers, Cocoanuts, and a Night at the Opera

<Maxwell> You have to like Horse Feathers and Monkey Business just for Thelma Todd.

> Brad - If you had been watching Milton Berle, she might have hit you with a giant powder puff and yelled "MAKEUP!"

<Kay Lhota> Thelma Todd was a beautiful lady

<Brad from Georgia> LL--Now I feel like Arnold Stang....

> Kay - I second that emotion.

<Steve "shimp"> OK, for a long time when I was a kid I saw a Ritz Bros movie, "The Gorilla", and thought they were the Marx Bros

<Maxwell> And a terrific comedian.

> Terrible what happened to her.

<Maxwell> (or as they said then, Comedienne)

<Steve "shimp"> And couldn't understand at all why anyone thought the Marx Bros were funny

<Kay Lhota> Hey, I just remembered. I saw a letter Thelma Todd wrote to her cousin in 1933, that she attended a party and Jack and Mary's house

<Kay Lhota> and got autographs for her cousin of Jack Haley and Jack Oakie

> I've found it's best to introduce a newbie to the Marxes through one of the tributes that collects all the great exchanges and one-liners and runs them in rapid succession.

<Brad from Georgia> Steve--you think that's bad? Once I watched a box of Ritz Crackers, thinking they were the Ritz Brothers. Later I realized the crackers were funnier.

> Kay - Really? I guess that's not completely surprizing.

> Brad - LOL

<Maxwell> Why a duck? Why-a no chicken?

<Steve "shimp"> Lots of Crackers in GA, huh Brad?

<Kay Lhota> I like the Ritz Brothers!

> Ooooooo

<Brad from Georgia> That's deep water. You try to cross over a chicken...

<Brad from Georgia> I hold no brief against the Ritz Brothers. I was just being Dennisish.

> I have a Tijuana Bible about Alice Faye mixing it up with the Ritz Brothers...

<Steve "shimp"> I like the Ritz Bros all right, but they're not the Marxes!

<Brad from Georgia> You know, the old Atlanta minor league team was the Atlanta Crackers. Probably couldn't get away with that today....

<Steve "shimp"> LL, that is scary!

<Maxwell> Maybe they could put Soda in front of Crackers.

<Steve "shimp"> What would Philsie say. Never mind, he'd buy two copies.

> Steve - It is pretty scary!

<Kay Lhota> nobody was the Marxes

<Brad from Georgia> LL, I listened to a Phil Harris/Alice Faye Christmas show today, with Jack Benny as Santa Claus.

<Kay Lhota> neither are Wheeler and Woolsey, but I like them too

<Maxwell> Not even Wheeler and Woolsey.

<Kay Lhota> LOL

> Steve - You ought to see the beginning of "Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Jack Benny" where Phil is telling David Reuben that he has some guidance for his next book.

<Maxwell> Beat me by 0.25 sec. Kay.

<Kay Lhota> that's hard to do!

> Whoa...the ESP helmet is being traded around, I see.

<Kay Lhota> I guess

<Steve "shimp"> Yeeeees...I oughta see that, LL!

<Maxwell> Now if this were L&H we'd say:

> Brad - Yes, that's a little tear-jerker.

<Maxwell> Shakespeare...

<Maxwell> Longfellow...

<Kay Lhota> Longfellow

<Kay Lhota> what goes up the chimney

<Brad from Georgia> I caught "The Horn Blows at Midnight" on TNT the other night.

<Steve "shimp"> With the acquitted Robert Blake?

> I also love "To Be or Not to Be"...but top 3? Hmmm...

<Maxwell> The only part I dislike about Horn is that there is physical stuff in it that's obviously stuntmen, not Jack Benny type humor.

<Kay Lhota> I'd like to see the Omnibus version

<Brad from Georgia> Maxwell--I agree. It's not half as bad as my operation, and marginally more funny.

> Maxwell - That's my problem exactly. Jack and physical humor, especially the really broad stuff like him in the coffee cup, don't mix well.

<Steve "shimp"> I would like to see the Omnibus version too, Kay.

> I wish I could FIND the Omnibus version.

<Maxwell> It wasn't as bad as they made it out to be for the next 20 years on his shows, though.

<Brad from Georgia> I thought Jack played the role well in "Horn." It was a strange kind of fantasy for him, but it's a funny movie.

> It did good box office! It really did!

<Maxwell> What year was that made?

<Brad from Georgia> I watched "Buck Benny Rides Again" while I was recuperating. Rochester is great in that one.

<Maxwell> (I hate to miss the conversation to go to imdb.

<Maxwell> )

> Hey, speaking of Jack in movies, let's start an argument. Do you think the man in the photos from Casablanca is Jack?

<Maxwell> Yes.

<Kay Lhota> I do not think he is Jack

<Brad from Georgia> Horn was 1945.

<Maxwell> My wife thought so when we watched the movie and saw the guy, too.

> Max - Launch another version of your browser and you should be able to go there without getting booted.

<Maxwell> No, I'm just too lazy to catch up on the reading.

<Kay Lhota> when the camera comes closer to him he looks too old

<Steve "shimp"> It looks like Jack to me, but I'd like to see him in motion.

<Brad from Georgia> I think it is Jack.

<Brad from Georgia> I notice he doesn't leave a tip.

<Kay Lhota> LOL

<Maxwell> Then it MUST be him!]

<Steve "shimp"> LOL Brad

> I'm getting all these E-mails from people wildly arguing one way or the other...

> Brad - You're on a roll tonight. Try rye next time. ;)

<Steve "shimp"> LL, why don't they post on the board?

<Brad from Georgia> Yes, where are those slugabeds?

> Steve - Various reasons. I think some of them are more comfortable as lurkers, and others just saw the pictures and reacted.

<Maxwell> I like a person with a rye sense of humor.

<Steve "shimp"> I'm tellin' ya, face recognition software!

> O'course I could just out them all and post the E-mails to the board, but I don't think that would be appreciated.

> Steve - Roll out the retinal scans...

<Brad from Georgia> Nah, if they can't take the heat, keep 'em out of the stove.

<Steve "shimp"> Send it to the FBI and let them have at it! We pay taxes, don't we?

> Hello, is Mr. Hoover there?

<Brad from Georgia> Steve--there is that software that lets the FBI scan for terrorists! You may be onto something!

<Steve "shimp"> The pics, that is, not the e-mails!

<Maxwell> Since you mentioned the board, I have a followup to a topic from a while back, the show that was a response to the review that attacke the show for being too nasty....

<Steve "shimp"> Mr. Jedgar Hoover?

> Too bad it's a B&W movie and we can't see if the eyes are bluer than the thumb of a cross-eyed carpenter.

<Brad from Georgia> Of course, I'm a guy who constantly gets stopped and searched in airports. I think it's the beard.

> Brad - A fake beard will do it every time.

<Steve "shimp"> What's that Maxwell?

<Brad from Georgia> Ah, the "bad taste" accusation, Maxwell?

<Maxwell> This Saturday, they're playing that show on a Chicago radio station....(Here I go plugging Chuck Schaden again)...

> Brad - Don't feel bad. Dan's a big, Jewish guy and gets stopped all the time.

<Maxwell> Right.

<Maxwell> The response to the accusation.

> Maxwell - Aha! Yes, I know that one.

<Steve "shimp"> The Gilbert Seldes show?

> With um...whatshisname...yeah, Gilbert Seldes!

<Kay Lhota> that show is quite funny

<Maxwell> Yeah, I couldn't think of his name, either. He used to review shows for TV Guide.

<Brad from Georgia> I'm reminded of the Popeye cartoon where Popeye and Bluto become ultra polite after a letter of complaint about the violence in their pictures.

> Sweetness and Light

> Brad - Really? I don't remember that one.

<Steve "shimp"> That's one from Palm Springs, I always get a craving for dates to snack on after that show!

<Kay Lhota> the cartoon is called "It's the Natural Thing to Do"

> Steve - Har har

<Brad from Georgia> LL--"It's the Natural Thing to Do--that was the song."

<Steve "shimp"> Guess that quake might have shaken a few loose today!

<Maxwell> Or the Simpson's episode where Marge cleans up Itchy and Scratchy.

> Kay - That sounds more like it has to do with prunes, not dates.

<Kay Lhota> LOL

<Kay Lhota> like taking Sal Hepatica?

<Brad from Georgia> LL--BTW, the Woody Woodpecker cartoon with the Frank Nelson waiter in it is "Woody Dines Out" from 1945.

<Steve "shimp"> Sal Hepatica might be a good name for Alex's daughter!

<Maxwell> Was that after Mel Blanc quit doing Woody's voice?

<Kay Lhota> LOL

> Brad - I'll be darned. If I've ever seen that, I didn't really know the Frank Nelson character at the time.

<Steve "shimp"> I keep telling my sister to name one Propecia Lavoris, but it never goes anywhere...

<Kay Lhota> in 1945? I think so.

<Brad from Georgia> Maxwell--Yes, it was Grace Lantz at the time.

> Sal Hepatica Buck. Yeah, that's good...

> How about C-R-E-S-T-A B-L-A-N-C-A...or...Super Suds?

<Brad from Georgia> I guess Joanie was lucky she didn't wind up Jell-O Grape-Nuts Benny.

<Maxwell> I. Pana

> Joanie came in 1934...they didn't know how long they'd have the sponsor at that time.

<Steve "shimp"> You didn't know JOAN was an acronym?

> Here's a bit of little-known trivia...

> On the I-beams in 1002 North Roxbury are written the Jell-O flavors and character names from the Buck Benny series.

> I can vouch for it. I've seen it.

> Steve - OK, what's the acronym?

<Brad from Georgia> LL--I've been wondering--did Don Wilson really regularly fluff "Grape-Nuts" into "Grapes-Nuts Flakes," or was that just a gag? Cool about the I-Beams!

<Steve "shimp"> Jell O And grape Nuts

> Brad - You know, I'm not sure. It certainly sounds intentional.

<Maxwell> They made Grape Nuts Flakes.

<Steve "shimp"> OK, it's weak!

<Brad from Georgia> Now, cut that out!

<Kay Lhota> I just hope the present and future owners of the roxbury house give a ding-dang about history and preservation

> Kay - Well.............how do you mean?

<Brad from Georgia> "Our contestants will win one page from the Encyclopedia Britannica and one Grapes-Nut--Grape-Nuts flake for each correct answer."

> I got a secret tour of the house some time back.

<Kay Lhota> It would break my heart of the house gets demolished

> That's how I saw the I-beams

<Brad from Georgia> Kay--It should be a national park!

> Brad - Har har...I remember that. I love Oscar Levant.

> Kay - It's not in danger of that. But it has been changed pretty drastically.

<Brad from Georgia> LL--What an ad-libber Oscar Levant was. A comedic delivery matched only by a beech tree.

<Kay Lhota> I saw pictures of it's renovation

> The front of the house is one of the most consistent parts of it. The pool is now gone (I was there days after it was removed).

<Kay Lhota> aww

<Kay Lhota> that's a shame

> Brad - A beech tree?

<Brad from Georgia> LL--The pool with the octopus? Aw, shoot.

<Brad from Georgia> LL--Well, a beech tree is wooden....

<Maxwell> After his much publicized nervous breakdowns, Levant was a regular on some quiz show that Carl Reiner starred in....

> Yup, the octopus is no more.

> Brad - Ahhhhhhhhh...IC.

<Maxwell> Still had the but, but it was kind of painful to watch him.

<Maxwell> bite, not but.

> Max - Sounds like Brad's dilemma. ;)

<Brad from Georgia> Levant always makes ME nervous, especially if I watch him.

> Oh, so I see I'm the only Levant fan in the audience. Oh well.

<Brad from Georgia> Yep, the doc bit me in the ... can you say that on the air?

<Kay Lhota> I have a favorite bit of Levant triva

<Kay Lhota> trivia

<Brad from Georgia> LL--I love his piano playing. He just makes me nervous.

> Kay - OK, shoot.

<Maxwell> Um...I love Levant...

<Kay Lhota> okay

> Brad - You're not alone.

<Maxwell> Plus he was a pretty fair piano player.

<Kay Lhota> he composed the opera for "Charlie Chan at the Opera

> I don't think he could have been so close to Gershwin if he wasn't a decent piano player.

<Steve "shimp"> I'm totally unfamiliar with Oscar Levant, sorry! But please continue, I'm learnin'!

<Maxwell> (I used to play an arrangement of the Sabre Dance by him when I was a kid and could still play.)

<Kay Lhota> and I was told by a friend that Oscar always wanted to have an opera open up with a tenor singing "Silencio"

> Maxwell - Hey, that's saying something. That's not an easy piece.

<Maxwell> I butchered it pretty good.

<Kay Lhota> It was supposed to be in the score of the movie, but I never heard it, and doubted that the story was true

> I've not seen the movie, so I can't say.

<Brad from Georgia> The opera from the Charlie Chan movie was...Carnival? something like that?

<Kay Lhota> but I got a record with the complete recording of the movie score, and it did indeed open with the tenor singing "Silencio"

<Kay Lhota> it's called "Carnival" but it's sort of a general-type opera with a lot of costumes and cast

<Kay Lhota> the big scene is the soprano and the baritone

<Kay Lhota> the bariton was Boris Karloff's role in the film

<Brad from Georgia> Right, right. I remember. I watched the movie because I'm a big Boris Karloff fan.

> Larry Adler told me that Oscar Levant was the only person he ever knew who actually took...gosh, what was the name of it...it's a drug mixed with wine and stars with an M.

> I want to say maudlin, but that isn't right.

<Brad from Georgia> laudanum?

> Brad - Yes, I think that's it.

<Kay Lhota> dear lord

> Obviously my brain anagrammed it.

<Brad from Georgia> Pretty strong stuff--the alcoholic tincture of pure opium.

<Kay Lhota> my heart always goes out to Oscar Levant

<Maxwell> Yup...opium and alcohol.

> Kay - My heart goes out to Levant's wife.

<Kay Lhota> yes indeed so!

> And Levant as well.

<Kay Lhota> such a talent.

> My anagrams are showing, Clarice...

<Brad from Georgia> Poor guy.

<Kay Lhota> LOL

<Brad from Georgia> I got one shot of morphine after my operation, and it near about wrecked me. I could no longer play the piano.

<Maxwell> When he appeared on that quiz show, he had all kinds of tics. That's what made him so painful to watch.

> Maxwell - Fortunately, the most I've seen of him was before he developed that. Stuff like "The Bandwagon" and hearing him with Al Jolson.

<Maxwell> Didn't he spend a lot of time in mental hospitals?

> Maxwell - Yup.

<Kay Lhota> yes

<Kay Lhota> I've read his memoirs

> But he, very much like Fred Allen, was one of the greatest wits of the 20th century in my book.

<Kay Lhota> and he was mentally ill in an era where there were no meds to treat depression

<Maxwell> It's been years since I've rad anything about him.

> Kay - I have "Memoirs of an Amnesiac" but I keep forgetting to read it.

<Kay Lhota> it's very interestinng, Laura

> He was on A&E's Biography during their "Tormented Geniuses" week.

<Kay Lhota> I saw that too

<Maxwell> I'll have to look for that.

<Maxwell> I've never seen it.

> Dan saw it with me and his reaction was, "Now, WHY do you like this guy again?"

<Kay Lhota> I was touched that he had nice things to say about working with Al Jolson.

> Kay - That's part of what I like about the shows with him and Al. I know a lot of people (mainly Jolie fans) who don't like them, but I do.

<Maxwell> I like both Jolson and Levant, and I love those shows.

> Jolie's my favorite singer, so couple that with a well-regarded Gershwin interpreter and I'm very happy.

<Kay Lhota> well, Jolson fans come in all types, I suppose.

<Kay Lhota> yes.

> Kay - They are an interesting lot. :)

> And on that note, I'll throw this out for discussion...

> In talking with someone in the Al Jolson Appreciation Society

> We made the observation that the devoted fans of a particular celebrity

<Kay Lhota> I am in that society

> seem to take on some of the characteristics of that particular celebrity.

> Not out of a sense of, "Hey, I wanna be like them"...they just, well, let me give you an example...

<Steve "shimp"> Like owners who look like their dogs?

> I have often said that Benny fans, by and large, are some of the nicest folks around.

<Kay Lhota> that is an interesting thought.

<Maxwell> How do we know it's not the dogs who look like their owners?

<Steve "shimp"> Heh, good point maxwell!

<Kay Lhota> this is something that deserves some thought.

<Brad from Georgia> I have a trouble of absorbing accents when traveling. Once in Scotland, I asked my wife, "Have ye packed my wee shoes?"

> They tend to be a little more passive than most fans, not so aggressive, pretty happy and appreciative.

<Steve "shimp"> LL, also I think people may become fans of performers they identify with

<Steve "shimp"> It's a two-way street, so to speak.

> Steve - I brought up that point as well.

<Brad from Georgia> I certainly identify with JB. I'm cheap and vain about my age.

> Of course, it makes my job a lot easier to have happy, appreciative members.

<Maxwell> You're 39? So am I!

<Kay Lhota> I'm very attracted to animated jewish comics. I find them quite attractive.

<Brad from Georgia> I was away for a second--my daughter Simba was calling from Orlando (Amy plays Simba in the Lion King show, brag, brag).

> Kay - Same here. :)

<Kay Lhota> I seem to go for guys like Eddie Cantor, Sid Caesar, Danny Kaye

> Kay - I'll have to tell you some time about Jackie Mason pursuing me.

<Brad from Georgia> So I should tell a joke now, nu?

<Steve "shimp"> I guess I "get" Jack's reactions to a humorously abusive world....

<Steve "shimp"> It's very much how I just laugh when people are bizarrely rude or undermining toward me.

<Kay Lhota> I know someone that went with Jackie Mason for a while

> Kay - Before or after he was married?

<Kay Lhota> he wasn't married when they went out in 1994

<Brad from Georgia> You know, I think that JB actually helps me cope with rudeness. I tend to laugh at it rather than get angry.

<Kay Lhota> but it didn't work out between them for various reasons

<Steve "shimp"> Very much so, Brad, I credit him with that, keeping me sane.

<Brad from Georgia> Oh, wait, Steve just said that. See, I identify with Milton Berle, too.

> Kay - You sure about that? I went out with him in 1991 and found out later that he had married his manager previously.

> Brad - That's a good reaction. I like that.

> Brad - I mean, what Steve said. Whatever.

<Kay Lhota> oh, that lady manager? The one that this person nicknamed "Mommy Dearest?"

> Kay - That's the one.

<Brad from Georgia> Once I found myself in a JB situation. I was in a restaurant, and no matter WHAT I ordered, the waitress came back and said, "We're out of that." She was apprehensive!

<Kay Lhota> I'm certain that the year was 1994

> Mason said he married her "to be closer to his money".

<Kay Lhota> uh boy

> Brad - Apprehensive or offensive?

<Brad from Georgia> So I just said, "Well, what do you have?" First thing she mentioned, I said, "Bring me that, quick!" She was so relieved!

> Kay - I know my year was 1991. September to be exact.

<Brad from Georgia> She thought I was getting angry. I was getting more and more amused!\

<Steve "shimp"> Yeah, I love meeting characters like that, that kind of thing doesn't upset me

<Maxwell> Brad, I can hear Jack saying that, "Well, what DO you have?"

<Kay Lhota> well, I never heard that they were married, but I had heard that she was great at making trouble

> Brad - I've been in that situation as well. Finally, the friend I was with pointed at something and said, "What's that?" They told us. He said, "Great. Two."

<Steve "shimp"> And it cracks me up when people do get so frustrated about bad waiters or whatever.

> Max - It's rheumatism makes me walk that way.

<Kay Lhota> LOL

<Brad from Georgia> I felt just like JB: "Well, I'll have the chicken sandwich." She: "We're out of that, too." Me: "What about the meatloaf?" She: "No meatloaf." Me: "What about--" She: "Just served the last one."

<Brad from Georgia> Me: "I didn't FINISH yet!"

> Kay - How long did they go together?

<Maxwell> LOL

<Kay Lhota> a few months, I think. This woman that I knew was a friend of my sister in law

> Kay - Based on my experience (ahem...not quite firsthand...if you know what I mean), they have a pretty open marriage.

<Kay Lhota> and the problems that she was having between Jackie and the manager were not good for her

> Kay - OK, she's got me beat. Jackie chased me for about two weeks while he was playing the Curran in San Francisco.

> Kay - Perhaps now you know the reason why!

<Kay Lhota> it sounds to me like you did well to run

<Brad from Georgia> And here I've never been chased by a star...but Nichelle Nichols did force-feed me a kiwi fruit once.

<Kay Lhota> LOL

> Brad - I know a few men who would kill to have that experience...

<Kay Lhota> kiwi fruit won't hurt you.

<Maxwell> Closest I've ever been to a star is getting an autograph from Homer & Jethro.

<Steve "shimp"> LOL Maxwell

<Brad from Georgia> She'd never seen them and thought they weren't ripe because they were green. She thrust one into my mouth so I would prove it was edible.

> Maxwell - Ah the successors to Lum and Abner...

<Steve "shimp"> When kiwis first hit the market big in the '80s, I remember people calling them "gorilla balls" to horrify the girls...

<Maxwell> Jethro Burns was quite a mandolin player.

> Brad - The mind boggles...but we're a family show and I won't go there.

<Steve "shimp"> They wouldn't eat them either!

<Maxwell> He lived in Chicago for several years before he died.

<Brad from Georgia> My son once ran across Ernie Sabella in an airport and recognized and spoke to him. Sabella was so flattered he gave my son tickets to A Funny Thing Happened on My Way to the Forum

> Steve - Hmmm...makes me think of Rocky Mountain Oysters.

> I'll take the gorilla balls, LL!
<Kay Lhota> oh, that's sweet.
<Brad from Georgia> My son walked up beside him and said, "Hakuna Matata...what a wonderful phrase--" in a
passable Timon voice, and Sabella sang the song with him!
<Laura Leff> Brad - Hey, that's nice. I've heard that a lot of the "lower echelon" actors really appreciate being
<Kay Lhota> and since it was his role in a cartoon, that's all the more sweet
<Laura Leff> Artie Auerbach's niece is a big Star Trek fan, and she's told me about a lot of wonderful
encounters with various performers from various series.
<Brad from Georgia> I once saw Tony Bennett in an Italian restaurant and jsut said, "You're a great singer." He
paid for my wife's and my lunch!
<Laura Leff> Brad - Hey, clue me in. I think I know that reference, but it's not clicking.
<Steve "shimp"> Kitzel would be a great comic star trek Alien!

> Oh crud, need the last couple screen pages E-mailed to me. Thanks.

> Steve - I can see him as a Ferengi.

<Brad from Georgia> Timon and Pumbaa were the main comedy characters in Disney's "The Lion King." Sabella was Pumbaa's voice (the flatulent warthog--the role, not the actor!)

<Maxwell> I was about to say the same thing, LL.

<Kay Lhota> LOL

> Brad - Ah, never seen "The Lion King". OK, I feel better.

<Steve "shimp"> Sent LL

> Steve - Thank you!

<Kay Lhota> Did you ever see him on an episode of "Quantum Leap?"

<Maxwell> My kid was too old when the Lion King came out, so I've never seen it either.

<Kay Lhota> he did it in 1989

> Kay - Who, Mr. Kitzel? :)

<Kay Lhota> Artie Auerback

<Kay Lhota> oops

<Kay Lhota> Ernie Saballa

<Kay Lhota> I'm sorry. My head is spinning.

> Kay - No, the most I've ever seen of Scott Bakula was on "Enterprise".

<Kay Lhota> oh, darn.

<Maxwell> Enterprise...grumble....

<Kay Lhota> "Quantum Leap" was the show that I fell in love with.

<Brad from Georgia> My wife, a huge fan of Star Trek and Buffy, met Armikn Shimeman (Quark on Deep Space 9), recognized him, and he sat and talked with her for two hours. He really enjoyed being recognized.

> Maxwell - Grumble that it's off, or that it was a mediocre series?

<Maxwell> The latter.

<Maxwell> I had high hopes for it.

<Kay Lhota> I did too.

> Brad - Yeah, that's exactly what I mean. When you get past the A-list of celebrities, they often enjoy being recognized.

> Maxwell - Same here.

<Brad from Georgia> I once sat behind Kenny Rogers on an airplane, but he was really unpleasant.

<Steve "shimp"> Didn't offer you a roaster?

> Brad - I met Barbara Mandrell, and she seemed really nice.

> Brad - Did you play poker with him?

> Was the plane bound for nowhere?

<Kay Lhota> My Grandpa told me about how he sat near Judy Garland once on an airplane, and he was panicking and acting like a nut.

<Brad from Georgia> And once I met Julie Newmar, but she's awfully tall. We did have a nice face-to-bosom chat, though.

<Kay Lhota> LOL

<Maxwell> I'll bet it was an enjoyable conversation.

> Brad - I know a few men who would kill for that experience....

<Brad from Georgia> Kenny was just grumbling about everything. He didn't get first-class, he wanted free drinks, the air conditioning on the plane was too cold....

<Steve "shimp"> Star fits, gotta be amazed at that stuff!

> I remember meeting Phil Harris. That was pretty unforgettable.

<Maxwell> He could no longer afford a private jet....

<Kay Lhota> Phil Harris was gracious to you, wasn't he?

> I've had people freak out a bit over meeting me. It always seems so strange to me because I think I'm nobody.

<Steve "shimp"> See, I could care less about meeting the A-List, but meeting someone like Phil would send me for a loop

<Maxwell> You're an internet celebrity (and more)!

> Kay - Phil was very, very nice to me. It was strange to drive up to his house and have him come running out in Palm Springs gear, flagging me down.

<Brad from Georgia> Julie was very surprised that I remembered her as Stupefyin' Jones in "Li'l Abner." "But I had no lines," she told me. "Ma'am," I says, "you had 'em then, and you got 'em now."

<Maxwell> Those aren't LINES, brad.

> Steve - When I first went to Los Angeles, I didn't want to see Disneyland or Knotts Berry Farm or anything. I wanted to interview Sam Perrin and visit Hillside Cemetery.

<Kay Lhota> wow

<Brad from Georgia> Phil would be a great person to talk to. I would love to have met Dennis Day and Don Wilson, too.

<Steve "shimp"> Exactly, that's how I operate, too, LL!

> Maxwell - Those are curves, not lines.

<Steve "shimp"> Non-conventional obsessions, as it were!

<Maxwell> Correct.

<Kay Lhota> I was 12 when I first went to LA in 1970. after a week there, I didn't want to leave!

<Brad from Georgia> She had a pair of parabolas that could cause cardiac arrest in a yak.

> Palm trees still hold a special fascination for me. I slept on the plane to Los Angeles, then woke up when we got there and there were...PALM TREES. I knew I was over the rainbow.

> Brad - Yak yak yak yak yak

<Steve "shimp"> Didn't Julie Newmar have some kind of horribly painful condition?

<Brad from Georgia> I'm going to LA for the first time in July. By then I can sit!

> Brad - Ah, going to visit any Benny sites?

<Maxwell> I haven't been to LA since 1963.

<Brad from Georgia> Julie had back problems, I know. The whole time I was around her, she never sat down.

<Steve "shimp"> That must have been it, Brad.

<Maxwell> "Don't Get Around Much Anymore"

<Brad from Georgia> LL--Yep, going to have lunch with Eddie Carroll! Also going to do a little touring around, and I hope to see some Benny sights, including the Cucamonga statue.

<Kay Lhota> the last time I went to LA was in 1993 for a "Quantum Leap" convention.

> Brad - You know, I've never seen the Cucamonga statue in person.

<Steve "shimp"> I try to circumvent LA and NY as much as possible, I get really excited about places like Pigeon Forge though!

<Brad from Georgia> LL--I'll try to take a photo!

> Steve - You ought to see my pictorial tour of Laramie, Wyoming.

<Brad from Georgia> Steve--Pigeon Forge! Dollywood!

<Steve "shimp"> LL, seen it! It's great

> Brad - Oh, I've seen it on the Web. It's almost identical to the Waukegan statue.

<Steve "shimp"> Brad, just came back from there a couple of weeks ago. Saw Elvis' underwear in the museum and the haunted fudge shack.

<Brad from Georgia> LL--Yes, but I plan to put a dollar bill in its hand....

<Steve "shimp"> Yes, you read that right.

<Kay Lhota> haunted fudge? okay....

<Brad from Georgia> Elvis's underwear...haunted fudge...too much information....

<Kay Lhota> LOL

<Steve "shimp"> Yes, haunted fudge.

<Brad from Georgia> I've been to Graceland!

<Kay Lhota> it's too hot.

<Maxwell> Those two things should never be paired.

> Haunted fudge...those aren't walnuts...they're BONE FRAGMENTS...

<Steve "shimp"> I didn't understand it either. And, not that you ask, but, whitey tighties!

> Sorry, having another Hannibal Lecter moment.

> I have to stir my sweetbreads...

<Brad from Georgia> Oh, Rochester, are those fava beans done yet?

> I have to go down to the vault and select a nice chianti.

<Steve "shimp"> It puts the Jell-O in the basket...It puts the Jell-O in the basket...

> Steve - ROFLMAO

<Brad from Georgia> Boss, you gotta do somethin' about these lambs. Can't you keep 'em quiet?

> I see we have some other "Silence" fans here too...

<Maxwell> I've only seen the last 15-20 minutes of it.

> It puts the Jell-O in the basket or else it gets General Tire again...

> Maxwell - Oh, then you've missed the best parts.

<Maxwell> So I've heard.

<Steve "shimp"> I'm having an old friend for dinner...yep, it's off to Fred Allen's house

> So...um...what else Benny-wise is on everyone's mind?

<Brad from Georgia> "Billy Rubin, Clarice? You're sure he said 'Billy Rubin'?" "Well... ikt may have been Benny Rubin."

<Maxwell> On the other hand, I'm the only person I know who liked The Road to Wellville.

> Brad - Ah, and someone who's read the book!

<Brad from Georgia> ikt? it, that should be.

<Brad from Georgia> LL--Yes. It's a long dang time between novels for that guy, ain't it?

> Maxwell - I haven't seen the whole thing. I try not to watch movies on Comedy Central.

<Maxwell> I don't blame you.

> Brad - Well, he did "Hannibal" which seems to have been purely a backlash against Lecter's popularity. I read that book in about two days.

<Brad from Georgia> "You hear the lambs, don't you Clarice? And that's why you can't sleep." "Uh, actually it's your violin that bothers me."

<Kay Lhota> LOL

<Brad from Georgia> LL--Sorry, was just off into shadowcasting.

<Maxwell> Somehow I have this picture of Jack as Hannibal playing Love in Bloom.

> Brad - Har har har

<Maxwell> And I find it quite disturbing.

<Brad from Georgia> And the other inmates: "For the love of God, make him stop! We'll be good!"

> Dr. Lecter does enjoy his petty torments.

<Kay Lhota> LOL

> I hope everyone's been OK with this very loose chat we've been having this evening.

<Kay Lhota> oh, sure!

> I can moderate with a firmer hand, but it seems like everyone's been in the swing of it.

<Steve "shimp"> Oh, yeah. This one's been fun!

<Brad from Georgia> No, I'm offended and upset. Wait a minute, I was never on topic--never mind.

<Kay Lhota> LOL Brad!

> Sometimes the small, loose groups are the most fun.

<Maxwell> Didn't bother me a bit.

<Brad from Georgia> Next time I'm gonna chat the way a MAN chats....sitting down. Standing up gets old.

> I don't know what people think about reading the transcripts, but hey, they gotta be here to vote.

> Brad - I could make a joke at that, but then I'd have to edit it from the transcript to be family-friendly.

<Maxwell> Brad, you must look like Mark Russell at your computer keyboard.

<Brad from Georgia> So...what does a woman do sitting down, a man does standing up, and a dog does on three legs?

> Shake hands.

<Brad from Georgia> LL--Rimshot!

> I learned that one from my father a million years ago.

<Brad from Georgia> I can't understand that. I'm only 39.

<Maxwell> No wonder you identify with Hannibal Lecter.

> I'm 39 and I'm only 36.

<Brad from Georgia> 39 4ever

> That's the name of the book.

<Brad from Georgia> l33t speak

<Steve "shimp"> LL, tell me you have vanity plates with "39 4EvR" on 'em!

> So...should we keep going or call it good? The Red Sox are playing the Cubs and SOMEONE'S got to win...

<Brad from Georgia> Live from the Internet, it's the IJBFC program, with Laura Leff, Maxwell, Shimp, Kay, and Brad, brought to you by 39 Forever....

> Steve - I tried, and it was taken! My license plate is KUBLSKY.

<Maxwell> I hate the Cubs.

<Steve "shimp"> Excellen!

<Brad from Georgia> I'm gonna go lie down. I've been lying online long enough tonight.

<Steve "shimp"> t!

> Maxwell - I've heard Chicagoans prefer the White Sox.

<Steve "shimp"> OK, folks, sounds good to me to call it a day.

> Brad - Har har...take care of yourself! And your...well, you know,.

<Maxwell> Um...only the intelligent few.

<Kay Lhota> Since the Cubs are the heartbreak team.

<Maxwell> The masses prefer the Cubs.

> Very good. Thanks all for a great chat tonight!

<Kay Lhota> But they creamed the Red Sox on Friday

<Brad from Georgia> LL--Thanks. I'm actually mending well. I can walk 3 miles a day without pain--just can't sit!

<Steve "shimp"> Brad, keep us posted on eddie carroll!

<Maxwell> That's one reason I'm a White Sox fan.

> Maxwell - They love the Cubs in Fort Wayne. Go figure.

<Kay Lhota> LOL

> I'm a Red Sox fan.

<Brad from Georgia> Sure well, Max. So long, everyone.

<Maxwell> So long!

<Steve "shimp"> Night everyone.

<Kay Lhota> goodnight

> We're a little late folks..